Mike, MIA

Evidently, Mike's still suffering from the humidity.

New Blog Site

Hi all! Just wanted to give you the link to my new blog. It's not particularly Real Estate focused. As mentioned in my previous entry here, it's more general... about life, thoughts, reflections, etc. So here it is:

http://followyoursoul.zaadz.com/

Hope you enjoy! And feel free to drop me a line there too! :)

thanks to all of you who have followed us along our real estate journey! An update on Mike: he just moved to New York (!) and has been busy settling in. He promises to write as soon as he recovers from the humidity.

Conspiracy Theories and Tangents

TREE's DIARY:

Wow, every time I write an update, I'm usually surprised at how much time has passed since our last entry. This time I am shocked!! Over a year! Seriously, what is happening to our time? It doesn't feel like a year, maybe a few months at the most, but yet, the calendar tells me I am one year older than when I last posted here.

Insane. I think Global Warming is doing something to our time, speeding it up somehow. Or maybe it's some conspiracy. Somewhere, somehow, someone is responsible! Seriously, does anyone feel the same way? Just yesterday I was celebrating the new year and now it's already March, 2007???? (Well, actually, since I celebrate the lunar new year, which was Feb 18, I guess that feels closer to "yesterday" than Jan 1st.) BUT STILL! Time is whizzing by, like Superman, at the speed of light! And beyond!

But anyway, focus, Tree, focus. Get to the house, they want to know about the house. It's 6:30 in the morning and Mike is undoubtedly home snoring away in his warm super comfy memory foam padded bed but I can hear him as I type. Telling me to "focus, don't be too long winded, no tangents." No tangents, right. Get to the point. (if you don't remember the "too many tangents" blog, click here and scroll down to March 24.)

Aaah, the joys of close friendship. Actually, I don't even consider Mike a friend anymore. He's way beyond that. "Friend" is just not a strong enough word to describe our connection. Not even "best friend" or "close friend." He's more like a limb. Yea, a limb, like my arm. He's like my arm. We're attached, we're one, we're connected. There is no separation. Whatever I have, he has. Wherever I am, he is. In spirit, in mind. He's like a default computer program, always present, even if it's not running. But I like the arm analogy better. It's more personal, more natural, primal. Sometimes it's scary, being that close to someone. You think they think the way you do (because, after all, you're one), but then they do something you wouldn't do and you get so frustrated at yourself, I mean, at them, I mean... who am I talking about again?

Oh yea, my arm. Mike. And there's his voice again, out of the dark misty morning nowhere that surrounds me, "GET OFF YOUR TANGENTS!"

OK! So, about the house...

Wow, the house seems like a dream now, it's somewhere floating in that mist, going in and out of blurriness, I can barely see it anymore.

Sorry (again) for not updating this sooner. The sale of the house came and went so quickly and effortlessly that we forgot all about it. Until now, that is, tax time.

This was by far the easiest escrow I have EVER had in my ENTIRE life!! Ok, well, I haven't exactly been buying and selling my ENTIRE life… but you know what I mean.

We had an offer within the first week that the house went on the market. The offer included no contingencies, no inspections, no appraisals, a 21 day close, and all cash up front. Now how could we resist that???? It was a little lower than what we wanted so we countered and ended up getting our asking price. I think. Did we? Man, I really don't remember. But I think we did... My arm will correct me if I'm wrong, I'm sure. :)

Mike and I were sent paperwork to sign and before we knew it, we received a call of congratulations that escrow had closed. Seriously, it felt like only a matter of days (see, there's that conspiracy again).

Kind of made us wonder if we had made the right decision!

But then again, decisions aren't necessarily right or wrong, are they? They simply are. If we learn and grow with each decision we make, we're on the right track, aren't we? But then again, tracks aren't necessarily right or wrong, are they? They simply are. If we learn and grow with each track we take, we're… oh never mind.

You get the idea.

Anyway, this may very well be our last post on this blog. I'm planning to start another blog soon, a personal one that's geared more toward my life, and life, in general. It will have a little bit of everything, from my philosophical thoughts to real estate to acting to writing to conspiracy theories, etc. YIPPEE! I'll get to go off on as many tangents as I want!! And they won't even be considered tangents because that will be the whole premise of the blog, to talk about anything and everything at anytime! Maybe I'll call it, "Tree's Tangents". Hmmmm... has a nice ring to it, what do you think?

(Mike's post coming soon)

When to say when

TREE's DIARY:

Well, folks, sorry to break the news... Mike and I have decided to sell Z-Tree. As you can tell from our lack of updates since last year (!), we have both lost our commitment to it.

Nothing really happened, other than LIFE itself, I guess.

We just both came to the conclusion that building the house, and all that entailed, was no longer a priority for either us, individually and collectively. It was no longer fun. Not that we expected it to be ALL fun, but at some point, the frustration came to outweigh the fun.

We were both extremely frustrated with the minutia of pre-planning. More specifically, the demands of the lender - because we're not licensed contractors, they have very strict guidelines and every step of the way, each line item has to be documented, outlined, signed by a licensed sub, revised, revamped, recalculated, etc., and we felt if they were being this nitpicky before we even start building, how much more will they be once we actually start? And how difficult would it be to get any monies reimbursed further along the line that we pre-paid for?

Secondly, getting a sub up in Big Bear to call back was an ordeal, to say the least. If you live in a small town, you know exactly what I mean. If you live in a large city, count your blessings that you don't have to deal with that!

There were various other factors that led us to the final decision but it would take too long to write. On the bright side, we're both very excited to sell the house and buy our next flipper. We're getting back to our original plan of buy, fix, sell. We won't lose any money on Z-Tree as property values have continued to rise up here, so that's always a good thing!

I think maybe we got in over our heads. For now we just want easy, light cosmetic fixers. Maybe just some tulips in the yard, new paint on the walls and even a kitchen cabinet revamp. No more demolishing of an entire house and rebuilding from ground up!

We're sad to see the plans go as our Architect designed such a beautiful house, but hopefully the next owners will want to build it and one day we'll be able to go see it actually manifest in 3D.

Or perhaps they'll just want to fix up the existing house. That would be interesting to see too. But we're really rooting for the new house!

For now, we're waiting for the snow to melt away so we can make that drive up the mountain and put it on the market.

I've been down in LA for several months now and enjoying the warm weather. It's amazing the difference a two hour drive can make. Winter white out conditions in Big Bear, sunny and warm in LA. Crazy.

Ok, I'll go now because Mike has something to say too.



MIKE's DIARY:

The end?

After a year of dealing with loan paperwork and Herculean efforts on Tree’s part in attempting to contact local contractors to do the foundation, we have decided to call it quits. Actually wait, let me take that back: we never gave up. I think that’s an important point. Our goal from the beginning was to make this a business. To purchase homes, renovate them and flip them. It just so happens that our first endeavor turned into a total teardown situation which, under certain circumstances, may have been do-able but due to the location and local resources of this property, was more than what we could handle at this time. So we made the RIGHT decision for us which was to just sell off the property as-is to someone willing to have the entire job contracted. No regrets.

For those of you who have followed our little sporadic blog I am sorry we won’t be able to take you through the teardown and construction. A part of me still wishes we could have done it. I really would love to see our house built and I hope we find a buyer willing to take our plans and make them a reality. Honestly, I feel like those plans are our potential child and I would love to see her grow up into the beautiful home I know she can be. Even though we will not have built her, that would give me a great sense of accomplishment.

So stay tuned, friends. We’ll take you through the sale of the property and Tree and I have already begun scouting for a fixer-upper we can buy. I’m hoping we can find something closer to home, perhaps the outskirts of LA? Not having to make a 3 hour drive to get to the house would be nice, and now that Tree has decided to move down here to the flatlands this just makes sense for the both of us.

I think we’ll make a decent return on our investment. Nothing big, but I don’t think we will feel as though we have wasted all that time, effort and money. Here’s what I learned in the past month:

1) Know what your intentions are and stick to them. Are you buying a home to live in for many years to come? A fix and flip? A springboard to live in for a couple years then move on to a larger home?

2) It’s ok to become emotionally attached to your home, but NOT to your investment! This is the mistake Tree and I made. We lost sight of our initial intentions when we fell in love with the property and the potential it held. Not a bad thing as far as feelings go, but not good for business.

3) Have a plan for your purchase before you close the deal. It’s ok if certain things change along the way, hell that’s life, but go in to it with both your feet planted and knowing what your next step is going to be.

This sounds pretty simple but you will be surprised how easily they can get away from you. So keep these in mind as you delve into your own adventures in real estate.

Angels

If you look up "Angels" in the dictionary, you get:

John & Kathy Acosta

They may have just saved our house.

More later...

Foundation costs

TREE's DIARY:

Amount we estimated in our budget for the foundation: $30-40,000

Amount sub-contractor quoted us today: $125,000

Amount on my face when they told me: Priceless!

Is it really worth it?

TREE's DIARY:

For the first time since Mike & I set out on this O/B journey, we are having serious second thoughts. We're actually considering NOT building the new house, fixing up the existing house as is and selling it (our original plan!).

Just not sure what to do yet. Whatever we do, we'll both decide on it together. And whatever we do, we'll make sure to have no regrets with whichever choice we make. At this point, we both feel pretty secure that we'll make the most of whatever happens and be appreciative of what we have, regardless of how it turns out.

We have been going back and forth with our construction lender and they keep piling condition upon condition on us. Neither of us have ever applied for a construction loan before so we don't really have anything to compare it to. None of this has to do with our "lendability factor" (our credit, finances, etc.), it has more to do with the construction and pre-construction paperwork required. And boy, is there a lot of paperwork.

For those of you who have ever bought or sold a home, you know the avalanche of paperwork that comes with it. Imagine that times 100 for an Owner/Builder Construction-to-Permanent loan. And most of them aren't merely for signatures, they require a lofty amount of research, fact gathering and sometimes, even some outright guessing!

So, after almost a year, we're now at round 457 with the lender and not sure we want to go another round.

Is it really worth it?

The Good Neighbor

TREE's DIARY

Last month I promised you a good story about our dumpster bin, and here it is (who’da thunk a dumpster bin would make for an interesting story!):

After receiving the letter from the County to clear out the brush by October 18th, we rented a big dumpster bin from the CSD. Since Mike lives 2 hours away, and I live a few blocks away, it was up to me to clear the brush (After all, it was our usual exchange. He makes the mess, I clean it). :) Just kidding. He pretty much did all the hard work to chop down the trees (I love trees and couldn’t really be around for the brutal murdering of them), the least I could do was clean it up.

Anyway, I had been clearing out the never-ending brush piles little by little (there were numerous piles about 4 feet high and 5 feet wide) but October was a crazy month and I was out of town for most of it with my Search & Rescue commitments.

The Thursday before our deadline, my friend had driven up for the day from Los Angeles (2 hour drive!) to help out (Thanks, Dave!). By the time we filled the bin, there were still several piles spread out on the property. We decided to pull down as much brush as we can and pile it up by the bin. That way, when the bin was emptied (CSD came to empty it every Monday & Thursday), I could simply take the piles next to it and refill it without having to drag the piles from all over the property.

My friend and I left it at that. It was pretty much all we could do until they emptied the bin.

So on Monday, Oct. 17th, the bin was emptied. But that day brought a lot of rain, thunder & lightning storms and I preferred to sit by my warm fireplace and look out at it than be working outside in it. So I called the County to ask for an extension. They never called back.

The next day, our deadline day, I decided that no news meant bad news when it comes to the County, so I decided not to assume our extension was granted just because I didn’t hear from them, and headed out to finish the clearing.

I went to the property mid-morning and was surprised to see the dumpster bin half full. Not only was it half-full, but the piles of brush we had left beside it looked smaller. I didn’t know what to make of it but no one was around for me to ask, so I just proceeded to my brush clearing.

Half an hour later, my neighbor stopped by. He’s a small, older man, perhaps in his seventies, and lives alone in a very modest & humble house at the edge of the forest. I see him there every now and then when I’m at Z-Tree, tinkering about in his yard, just he and his dog and his beat up old rusted pickup truck.

I asked him if he had seen anyone on the property around the bin. He said he had been working out in his yard early in the morning when he saw the County truck driving up the street. He knew they were there to make sure we had cleared the brush and he also could see that we hadn’t. So he walked over and started filling our bin with the brush so that it would look like someone was still working on it.

He said the truck drove by slowly, he waved at the driver, the driver waved back in acknowledgment and drove away. He remained there, clearing our brush for us, half an hour after that just in case they turned around.

Mind you, this is a neighbor we’ve only had brief conversations with, nothing deeper than the usual neighborly chitchat.

I thanked him profusely and went on to finish the rest of the work.

After a couple of hours, I filled the bin. But there were still plenty of piles left. Our deadline being that day, and the bin full, I didn’t know what to do with the rest of the brush.

Just as I was pondering my dilemma, my old knight in shining armor appeared again. I guess he had seen me standing at the bin, looking hopelessly lost, so he came over to see if I needed any help.

I told him the situation and he suggested we drag the rest of the piles over to his property. At least they would be off my property (thereby complying with the County’s demands) and if it caused him to receive a notice, they would still give him a month in which to clear it, which bought me more time.

So he and I proceeded to spend the next hour dragging piles of brush across the street over to his property. I told him I could do it myself but he insisted on helping. He put his duct-taped gloves over his wrinkled hands and went to work. There was to be no debate, he had made it clear.

What a wonderful and generous man, our neighbor! We barely even know him and he has gone well out of his way to help us, asking for nothing in return. He saved us hundreds of dollars in fines but above and beyond that, he reaffirmed to me that the power of a single good deed goes a long way in touching someone else’s spirit. His thoughtful act not only touched mine, but also Mike’s when I told him about it, as well as anyone else I’ve shared this story with.

So I hope this touches your spirit as well, and inspires you to do a good deed for someone else.

It certainly has me.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

TREE's DIARY

Ok, so I’m finally in a much better place to write about last month's frustration and update you on what’s been going on this past month. Let me start with the bad news because I always like to finish on a good note so at least we can get that out of the way first.

The Bad (and the Ugly):

- Turns out the house will cost more to build than we originally anticipated. Approx. $30K more.

- The appraisal came in $35K shorter than we anticipated.

- Both of those combined increases our debt-to-income ratio with a new loan amount and changes our loan-to-value rate. What does that mean in plain English? That means instead of putting no money down, we now have to put $37K down to make up the difference.

- We received a letter from the County telling us to clear out all the piles of brush and downed trees that Mike had chopped down in the past few months (more from him on that later) or else they will fine us. Since dried up leaves, limbs and branches have a high flammability factor, especially when in close proximity to the forest (the Z-Tree property is at the edge of the forest), it must be removed, pronto. With October being the official start of our fire season, I can see why we received the letter! Our deadline was October 18th to clear out the brush.

- It snowed last weekend which means winter is here and most likely, we will not be able to get the foundation started & finished anytime soon. Unfortunately, everything relies on the foundation, which means… nothing else will get started anytime soon either. Which means… no construction until next year. Spring, perhaps. Which means… more waiting. Too bad we can’t build a house from the roof down. Who says we have to stick to convention and go from the ground up? :)

And now, for the Good:

- Haagen-Dazs Vanilla Swiss Almond ice cream.

- We were able to shave some $ off the cost of building the house by playing around with the numbers (what are numbers on sheets of paper anyway?) and reduced our down payment to $16K.

- More on the dumpster bin/brush clearing later. It's a great story, I promise!


And most importantly:

- We HAVE a house!

- We HAVE.

- Life is good.

@%$#!!!

TREE's DIARY

FRUSTRATED!

FRUSTRATED!!

What more can I say?

F-R-U-S-T-A-T-E-D!!!

That's pretty much all I have to say, really. Just need to let out some... AAAAAAARGH! $#@%!!!

...yes, FRUSTRATION!

Maybe I shouldn't deal with this O/B stuff while PMS'ing. I don't even believe in PMS, but sure sounds like a good scapegoat right now.

Hm, ice cream sounds good right now too.

Details, details, details!

TREE's DIARY

Our plans are approved! Our plans are approved!

First round, thanks to our Architect who Rocks with a capital R!

So many of you have emailed me in the past few months asking for details. Details, details, details! You want to know how much this and how much that and why is it taking so long and what’s the first step, then the next step, then the next and you want to know how you can do what we’re doing and on and on.

Well, let me start off by saying the information, whatever information you need, is OUT THERE, on the world wide web, just WAITING to be accessed!

Trust me when I say, we really don’t know what we’re doing, we really don’t!! All we can offer you is our experience as we go through them… this owner/builder game is brand new to us too, so please please PLEASE do your research and don’t take anything we say as “the law.” Read around, check out other O/B sites, browse web forums, ask questions, talk to anyone and everyone who has experience doing what you want to do, etc.

And then… PRAY!

Perhaps the most important piece of advice I can give (thus far) can be summed up in one word: Commitment.

Once you’ve decided to be an O/B, you must fully commit to your decision. Trust me, it’s not worth it if you don’t fully commit. The decisions you’ll have to make and the time & energy you’ll have to expend to carry out the rest of the steps are hard enough when one is clear/focused on their intention and commitment. Being an O/B is frustrating. I can’t imagine how much more frustrating it would be if one is uncertain and wavering on one’s purpose.

With that said, let me also assure you that frustration is just one of the aspects of O/B’ing. There is also fun, learning, satisfaction, growth and change.

Anyone can do this if they really want to. You don’t need any special skills or knowledge, just the burning desire (and commitment) to do it. There is no one way or right way to O/B. You figure out what works for you as you go along, and what works for one may not work for the other, so use your gut as your main source of guidance in all decisions and only use other people’s experiences to educate yourself in what may potentially work or not, for you.

Now, as far as financial and step-by-step details, here is what we’ve experienced so far. Remember, every country, state, city and county is different. Every house is different. Every market is different. Our costs may not even be in the ballpark of what yours might be, so please do not take our figures as cast in stone for your project. There is simply no comparison unless we live in the same County and are building the same size & style house. Not only that, but because our house will be built by the edge of the forest in a mountain community, there are different codes & fees than one that might be built elsewhere in the County.

After closing escrow, the first thing we did was find an O/B lender who would loan us money to build a house. We found IndyMac.

Then we hired an Architect (we took bids from 3 Architects/Designers who charged anywhere from $100 to $150 each just to come out to look at the property).

While the Architect drew up our first round of blueprints, we hired a land surveyor ($950) to determine where our property lines are (see 4/2 entry for more details on this and how you might get one free).

When the boundary survey came in and final blueprints were complete, we submitted the blueprints to the local fire department to obtain a “Fire Flow Letter” ($75), to the local hardware/lumber store to obtain roof truss drawings (free), to the DWP to obtain proof of service, and consequently to pay any connection fees ($185 because we have an existing water meter/service on the property, otherwise, would have been $7,900), and to the Community Services District to obtain sewer and easement verification (free).

These were all required by the County’s Bldg & Safety Dept. BEFORE submittal of plans. Upon obtaining all the above, we submitted the plans to Bldg & Safety.

While the plans were waiting for approval, we hired a General Contractor to create a materials takeoff ($250). Now that we have the takeoff, we’ve submitted it to a few lumber companies to give us bids. The rule of thumb is to get 3 bids. But, of course, get as many or as little as you want. We’re still waiting on our bids.

Now that the plans have been approved and the building permit issued, we have paid close to $2,000 to the County for permits & fees and $1,240 to the School District for a “Developer Fee” (which had to be paid before the County would issue our building permit).

All in all, nothing outrageous so far. I’ve heard horror stories of people paying 5 digits for permits & fees, but again, every state and county is different, and every project is unique. The guy at the Bldg & Safety Department today PROMISED me there would be no more fees. Yes, I made him promise on scout’s honor! :0)

Oh, and another thing I’ve found to be helpful: buy an accordion folder or a binder (with pockets for receipts) or some kind of organizing device that you can keep all your paperwork in for the project. Take this folder with you EVERY time you go to pay any fees or obtain any forms from anywhere! Also, take a set of blueprints with you too!

I have had to drive home on several occasions to get the plans or some random form that was necessary before obtaining whatever other forms I needed. The DWP needed to see my blueprints, the School District needed to see my Plan Check Submittal Form from the County, etc. You just never know what they’ll need to see, so bring everything just in case so you don’t spend your day driving back and forth.

And always, ALWAYS, have your checkbook with you! Most everyone you talk to will require some kind of fee or another. We don’t even question County or Dept. fees anymore, we just open up our checkbook and say “how much?”

It’s just part of building a house. Instead of lamenting over it, just go with it, you’ll be a lot happier. Like paying taxes, you could see it as a sign of success. Be grateful that you make enough money to HAVE to pay taxes! It means that you are making money! Be grateful that you are in the position of HAVING to pay developer/construction fees. It means you are building your very own house!!! How many people really truly get to say that in their lifetimes?

We'll have more details and costs as we go along and will update as we can. For now, have a joyful day, every day!

Cutting Down Trees

MIKE's DIARY:

Two weekends ago my brother and I went up to the house to start on the trees. As much as I hate the idea of cutting down healthy trees, we don’t have much choice. There are about 9 trees we’ll have to cut down and then deal with the stumps & roots. If you ever have to deal with trees over 12 inches in diameter get yourself a good chainsaw! Tree has a decent electric chainsaw but it is long hard work to take down a big tree with that thing. On this particular trip I borrowed my cousin’s gas powered chainsaw which we dubbed The Beast and it made a HUGE difference. It still took a little while to work through some of the larger trees but it was definitely easier on the arms.

The cutting went well and we finished 4 trees – 2 of which were already dead or dying which made me feel a little better about what we were doing. We chopped the downed trees into manageable logs which we stacked by the deck. The best part of that day was aiming the trees. We knew the basics of how to cut trees to fall in a particular direction but not being lumberjacks ourselves, it wasn’t an exact science and we had a couple close calls with the house. And yes, we hit it once. Kinda smacked the rails on the back upper deck. I heard the cracks and pops of the tree giving way and start to come down. I’m watching it fall then time slows a bit as I realize it’s not falling where we hoped and there’s nothing to do but watch it lean closer and closer to the house, then the inevitable crunch of 2X4s snapping like twigs as the tree ricochets off the deck and lands with a thud on the ground…it was pretty cool! But despite our competitive desire to make the trees land exactly where we wanted them too, there was no real worry about hitting the house since it’s our plan to tear it down anyway. But it felt pretty damn good when we made a tree hit the ground exactly where we wanted.

That weekend also happened to be the week the tail end of hurricane Emily swept over Big Bear which made for some interesting weather. We got in several hours of work on Saturday before we were rained out in the afternoon. This suited us fine since Robert & I had been working since the morning and were exhausted when the rain started to fall at 5pm. Sunday was a total wash with thunder storms all day.

So where we are at with the house is:
- final plans are complete and with the city for approvals & permits
- Tree & I are looking for a contractor to give us a materials take-off (estimate) for our construction loan
- we have about 5 more trees to cut down and all the stumps to remove

Another bit of business we need to figure out is the deck. Our big beautiful deck. We may have to tear it down. It’s going to need a lot of work anyway to fix up and it not being there will most likely make construction on the house much easier and go by faster. If we do tear it down we definitely plan to rebuild it, it’s too good a thing to loose. All for now.

More waiting

TREE's DIARY

Wow, can't believe it's August already! The final plans are in the county for approval, we're in the process of getting a materials takeoff so we can get the cost breakdown for the lender. Were quoted $1,000 from a GC for the takeoff. Sounds expensive but considering it's been difficult (that's putting it mildly) to find someone who will even return our phone calls (seems to be the modus operandi for Big Bear businesses), let alone follow through after communication, we think $1K might not be too bad after all.

I expressed my frustration to a guy at the local hardware store who is prepared to give us a bid once we have the takeoff and he said sympathetically, "up here, if you find someone who will actually call you back, you better hold on tight to them, because chances are you'll probably not find another one!"

Needless to say, we'll be subbing most of the work to flatlanders (people who live off the mountain) as much as possible.

I was able to find a good tip from another O/B who suggested going to Lowe's for an estimate. I believe it's a new thing that Lowe's started, you can check it out on their website at: http://www.accurateestimates.com

Keep in mind I'm not personally recommending them as we haven't tried them but Mike is going to meet with them tomorrow (there isn't a Lowe's up here). We'll keep you posted.

That's about all the update we have. Mike cut down some trees over the past month, still have more to go but it's been storming up here and he didn't think it would be a good idea to have the electric chainsaw out in a thunder/lightning storm.

I agreed with him. :O)

Waiting...

We're still alive... waiting, waiting, waiting....
Final plans coming soon, then onward & upward!
Will have updates when they are complete.

New Owner/Builder Links page

Just added a new links page with Owner/Builder resources. More to follow next week. Scroll down to the side bar on the right hand side of your screen to access it. Have a superb weekend, everyone!

Patience & The Art of Letting Go

TREE's DIARY

At long last, the boundary survey finally came in (two weeks late) and the final preliminary plans have been approved. (Isn't that an oxymoron: final preliminary?)

We went over the final preliminary plans yesterday with our Architect and made some cool last minute changes. We both left full of excitement for the potential of the new house.

Waiting on the final final plans to be completed then we can submit to our lender and finalize the loan once and for all. THEN the fun stuff can begin, like demolishing the house!

Mike and I are itching to get started on that, have been since January! We're not supposed to tear down until our O/B loan is official, otherwise our current lender may demand full payment of the mortgage if there is no house there. Yikes! But we've been cheating a little here and there, we've torn down alot of the studs & 2x4's inside the house, ripped out some of the carpet, insulation and railing for the stairs. Basically anything that is inside the house, unseen to the outside passer-by.

It's amazing how much time is spent waiting. When our Architect first told us it would take months to get the final plans because of all the back & forth with changes, etc., I thought to myself, "it may take others months, but it will take us only weeks, maybe TWO months max because we'll get back to him ASAP."

Well, hee hee. Ignorance is bliss, is it not?

So many factors come into play, everything is dependent on everything else to advance to the next step. Can't do this until we have that. Can't have that until we get the other thing. Can't get the other thing until this is complete, and on and on.

I HIGHLY recommend becoming an Owner/Builder to anyone who wants to learn patience and the art of letting go. You'll have a chance to practice practically every single day! What a great oppportunity!

The most important lesson I've learned is to get on with your life and deal with it as it comes up. Have a life outside of your O/B life and live fully. Then the O/B stuff becomes fun, stressfree and light, as it is meant to be. Otherwise, you will spend every single day for the term of the entire project (which can take years from beginning research to final home!) worried, stressed and frustrated. (It took me several months to get to this place, btw)

Yes, there are deadlines. And yes, some of them will not be met. It's part of the process and must simply be factored in as they spring up.

As a writer, meeting deadlines is the end all & be all of every job. Create a reputation of meeting or beating deadlines with quality work and you will always have work pouring in. Miss a few here and there and you might as well go get an office job. Deadlines are the bane of my existence, yet, they are the bread that keeps me fed in my business.

As an Owner/Builder, deadline schmeadline.

When we closed escrow in January, we thought we'd be building by now, if anything, at the very least, have the framing up already. But 6 months later, we are still working on the plans and the original house is still in tact. Our goal was to complete construction by October, when winter starts. Now our goal is to at least get the roof up by October, which may or may not happen. It's definitely pushing it. But we'll see. If it happens great, if it doesn't, we'll rearrange and factor in some new goals.

In the meantime, I'm working on an O/B links page with resourceful sites I've found to be extremely helpful. Will try to post that within the week. Please check back in again soon.

Construction Terms

TREE's DIARY

Ask and ye shall receive. Search and ye shall find. How true! After posting yesterday’s entry, I did a simple Google search for “construction terms” and within seconds found the following top 2 sites that defined all 93 of the terms from the Breakdown Worksheet.

http://www.contractorreferral.com/glossary. This site seems to be geared toward contractors and construction professionals so some of their definitions actually require definitions. They have over 12,000 terms with some pretty specific and detailed phrases as well as variations and abbreviations of terms, which is quite helpful if you don’t know the exact word. (They even have definitions for body parts, such as toe nail, tongue, and tooth.)

http://www.homebuildingmanual.com/Glossary.htm. This site is a bit friendlier to the average person (at least it is for me). I found the definitions a little easier to understand, though they’re not quite as comprehensive as the above site.

Well, that’s it for today. Hope you’ve found this info useful.

PS - And yes, a roof truss IS that big triangular thing that makes up the roof!

Is a roof truss that big triangle thing that makes up a roof?

TREE's DIARY:

Well, hell. Sometimes you just want to throw your arms up in the air and give up. Ok, so I’m exaggerating a bit. I don’t really want to give up. But…I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. We just really haven’t a clue as to how to build a house and with each step of the way, we come across something new. Something that requires hours of research just to figure out where to begin. And who the heck has the time? Mike has to work, and dammit, I want to go play in my garden!

Seriously though, I work too. Fortunately, I’m on my own schedule, so unfortunately, the brunt of the research goes to me. But hey, that was our commitment to the project and we are still extremely grateful for it, so I’m not complaining. Just venting a little.

Our lender has asked us to submit a Cost Breakdown (a detailed line item list of costs). We asked him how to go about doing this. He said that our final plans would include information for a contractor to provide this for us. Since we’re not working with a contractor (hence the term “Owner/Builder”), we would be the ones to estimate the costs. One O/B we know told us to submit our plans to contractors anyway (3 specifically), so we can get the cost breakdown and also get an idea of how much it would cost to have a contractor build the house (always good for comparison later on down the road - to see how much you saved by doing it yourself).

We confirmed with John that our final plans would have this information and this was his response:

“…The final blueprints will be a complete set of plans, ready to obtain the roof truss drawings, ready for a “fire flow letter” submittal to the fire department. When these two items are obtained (the first is usually by the contractor, the second is either by you or the contractor) then these blueprints may be submitted to the county for their plan check…”

Roof truss drawings? What’s that? Come to think of it, what the heck is a roof truss? And what’s a fire flow letter?

See what I mean by not having a clue???

Upon looking at the Cost Breakdown worksheet our lender sent to us, we are even more convinced of our cluelessness (not that we needed anymore convincing!)

The item list includes foreign words such as “embedded hardware” and “rough-in” and “millwork.” How is one to go about calculating how much the rough-in will cost for their house when one doesn’t even know what a “rough-in” is?

The answer to that is simple, though the implementation may not be easy: RESEARCH.

So here we go, off to do more of that wonderful research. Will get back to you next year when we’ve defined all 93 terms in the list.

Just kidding. Hopefully, we’ll be back within the week with some answers and will post them for those of you who are members of the same clueless club as we are!

Fire Department and Next Steps

TREE's DIARY:

The Fire Department turned down our offer to donate the house to them for practice. Since we are against the edge of the forest, it creates a greater risk for them during their training. They also need to have complete access to the house to do with what they may. One of our conditions of donating was that we need the deck intact and wanted to salvage some of the reusable wood from the roof. So it turns out our needs didn’t quite match.

To be honest, Mike and I are a bit relieved as we were looking forward to bashing down the concrete ourselves. And all our friends have voluntarily expressed interest in coming up and taking out some inner angst on those concrete walls too. So we’ve decided to have a demolition party and invite our friends up for a weekend to wreak havoc on the poor defenseless house.

But first, we need to secure our loan. Things are taking much longer than we had hoped, but it is moving, nevertheless. We’ve already been approved, it’s just a matter of how much. And that depends on the final appraisal of the proposed finished property. Here is an outline of our next steps so far… I say, “so far” because who knows what else will pop up unexpectedly!

1. Complete Boundary Survey (scheduled for May 6).
2. Submit Boundary Survey to Architect so he can draw up final plans.
3. Submit final plans to County for approval as well as lender for approval.
4. Lender orders an appraisal based on property value of final plans.
5. Estimate cost-breakdown of entire project step by step. Submit to lender.
6. Lender gives final approval of loan amount based on appraisal against total cost of project.
7. Demo house.
8. Upon receiving approval from County, we can finally break ground (in construction lingo, that means to physically “break” into the ground, to begin excavation for the project).

And we’re hoping to have all this complete within 2 months, max! Sounds simple enough, doesn’t it?

More on Boundary Surveys and The Hall of Records

TREE's DIARY:

Wow, it’s been almost a month since our last entry? Where did the time go? There’s really not much to report but since I haven’t updated in a while, I figure I better before you all think we’ve fallen under all the rubble and can’t get up!

Actually, we haven’t even torn the house down yet. I went to the Hall of Records (as mentioned in the last entry) to see if I can find a boundary survey and save $1,000. If you’ve never been to your County Recorder’s Office, I recommend going, just for the learning experience. You can look up all kinds of information, including the ownership history of your house (and any other house in the county.) You can even see any liens that exist or have existed on a particular property. Interesting stuff. If you have basic knowledge of a computer, you’ll be able to plop yourself down in front of one of their public computers and stay all day if you wish. I actually saw a guy order pizza for lunch. I don’t know if that’s generally allowed, but he looked like he was a “regular.”

Anyway, after a few hours of searching, I couldn’t find what I was looking for so I asked the lady at the desk for help (their search function did not allow you to look it up by address or parcel number – only by date the survey was performed and/or by the surveyor and/or person who ordered the survey – in my case, I didn’t even know if a survey existed, let alone when it was possibly performed or by whom, so I searched through ALL surveys in area. Fortunately I live in a small community and it took only a couple of hours to go through them all.). She gave me the address to the County Surveyor and told me to go search in their records. At the County Surveyor, I was able to find a Boundary Survey on the property behind ours, which gave us 2 of our corner boundaries, but no survey on our property.

Armed with this new info, I figured the price for a boundary survey would only be half of what they initially quoted, right? Considering we already knew where 2 of the 4 corners were, wouldn’t that mean the cost would go down since they only need to find 2 corners now instead of 4?

And beyond that, the two corners we found were the corners along the back of the property where the house will be built. We figured those were the two most important corners to determine anyway and who cares about the front two corners? The house is no where near the front.

I called Mike after leaving the Surveyor and told him the good news. He was so pleased with my new findings that he took me out to a nice dinner. Since I saved us $500-1,000 (or so we thought), the least he could do was pay for my meal!

We faxed this info to John and asked if it was sufficient to continue without a boundary survey. After all, can’t he just draw a straight line from the two corners recorded in the neighbor’s survey and figure out the whereabouts of the other two corners (if he even needed to know where those were?).

Ah… but as with all things we’re finding out in the course of our owner/building, NOTHING is as simple as it seems. And I mean NOTHING. Not even a dang corner.

Turns out we still need a boundary survey. Turns out the County requires a boundary survey to be done within the last 6 to 12 months. And it also turns out we still need to pay the full $1,000 since the surveyor must perform the same amount of work and reestablish the boundaries. And besides, they said (while laughing at me), the other survey could be wrong. Oh well. It was worth a try. I made the surveyor laugh though, and I guess that was worth it to brighten someone’s day.

I also finally got to go see the much-hyped Hall of Records. Investors often talk about how they (or their assistants) spend hours there searching for properties to buy and digging up info about them. Now I know first hand what they’re talking about.

And now I owe Mike a free dinner.

Boundary Surveys, Licensed Architects and Unlicensed Designers

TREE's DIARY:

One thousand dollars for a measly survey to tell us where our property lines are?!? What in the..? Is it just me, or does this seem like something the County should provide? Or whoever it was who came up with the parcel numbers and plat maps of the area? When I go to my County Tax Assessor’s site, I can print out a plat map (a map that shows the subdivision of a parcel of land into lots) and see the dimensions of my lot (and all the other lots in the area). If that info has been recorded, shouldn’t the boundary lines have been recorded as well? Why didn’t that person who physically went out to the land and went through all the trouble of recording all the subdivisions and took all the measurements to record all the dimensions of all the lots and wrote down all the names of the streets, also record the actual boundaries as well?

It just doesn’t make sense!

I didn’t even know what a “boundary survey” was until John (our Architect) told us we needed one. He needs to know where our property lines are so he can design the house in compliance with the setback codes (the Bldg. & Safety codes that determine the distance you must place between the house and the property line), and also so we don’t build part of the house over our neighbor’s land!

Anyway, after getting the $1,000 quote from a Land Surveyor (not to mention they won’t be able to “get to it” for a minimum of two months), I decided to do some research and see if this is a task I can do myself. I mean, our land is only 6,000 square feet! I can walk the entire property in less than 1,000 steps, why on earth would it cost over a dollar a foot? Don’t you just need to know where the four corners are? That’s $250 a corner!

So my first step was to find out exactly what a boundary survey is. After all, you can’t really do something unless you first know what it is you’re trying to do, right?

The official definition of a boundary survey is (as found on the web):

“A mathematically closed diagram of the complete peripheral boundary of a site, reflecting dimensions, compass bearings and angles and includes metes and bounds or other written description.”

Huh?

Ok, I don’t know what language that is so I found another definition:

“Boundary surveying is the art and science of establishing or reestablishing corners, lines, boundaries, and monuments of real property, based upon recorded documents, historical evidence, and present standards of practice.”

Huh?

A little better, but still, what exactly is a boundary survey and how does one go about performing one?

I did a little more research (don’t you just love the convenience of the World Wide Web?) and found out that when a Surveyor does a boundary survey on a property, they are required by law to record their findings with the County Recorder. It’s called a Record of Survey Map and is public record, therefore, anyone can have access to it.

So I called the County Recorder’s Office to make sure this is true (you never know what inaccurate info lurks on that wonderful web) and it turns out the info was indeed correct. They couldn’t tell me if my property had a Record of Survey Map but said I could come in and go through the records myself.

Next week I’ll go and see what I can pull. I figure, even if the property doesn’t have one recorded, perhaps I can look up the records of the properties immediately surrounding mine and by knowing where their property lines end, I can deduce where mine begins. Makes sense, doesn’t it?

But then again, we’re learning quickly with this house that when things seem simple to us, we’re in for a big awakening. Our naivety is quickly fading.

Oh, speaking of naivety, someone has since pointed out to us that the 3rd architect we went to, the McDonald’s Drive-Thru Architect, is not really an architect after all! He’s neither licensed nor insured. So what’s the big deal, you say? Just because you don’t have a fancy piece of paper doesn’t mean you don’t know what you’re doing, does it? Well, that’s what I said too! I know education is important but all the years a person spends in training in order to get their license doesn’t necessarily mean they are any good. I’m sure there are as many bad licensed architects out there as there are good unlicensed house designers.

But the point of hiring a licensed professional is not whether they are good or bad (hopefully, you can determine that by talking to them, paying attention to how they advise you and preferably getting referrals from friends or family), it is whether they have adequate training and/or experience, can protect your investment and get you the most for your money. Architects are held liable for any mistake they make as they are required by law to have insurance. An unlicensed designer, on the other hand, is not. If they cost you thousands (or worse, millions) of dollars in errors, you have no recourse other than trying to duke it out in a long, drawn out lawsuit.

If I wanted, I could place an ad in the yellow pages and offer my house design services today. Scary, isn’t it?

I didn’t realize the importance of a license until I started researching it. I would have never thought to ask someone for their license number. But ask, you must, if you want to protect your investment. Architects are the only professionals in the construction industry who are ethically bound to represent you, the building owner.

On your initial contact with a potential Architect, ask them for their license number. Once you have it, call the Architects Board in your state (every state has one) and ask them if the license # is valid. In California, their phone number is (916) 445-3394 or you can look it up yourself online at http://www.cab.ca.gov/. (Btw, you can also go to your state’s Department of Consumer Affairs website to look up license #’s of most other professions requiring a license.) The Board can also tell you if the Architect has had any disciplinary action taken against them.

Also, below is a link to a handy guide I found entitled, “The Consumer’s Guide to Hiring An Architect.” It’s from the California Architects Board and is slanted to California residents, but it contains a list of questions to ask a potential Architect that can be helpful no matter what state you live in.

Incidentally, we asked our Architect none of these questions. Except one, “how much will it cost?” But hey, live and learn, right? And I punched in his license number on the website out of curiosity (and PRAYING something would come up, since we’ve already hired and paid him a retainer!) and was relieved to find out it was valid. Phew!

I’m generally one to go with my gut feelings and forget everything else (though they’ve led me astray before – have you read our lender horror stories?) and though we got really lucky with our choice this time around, as uninformed as we were, it might be wise to do a little more research next time.

Here’s the site with the handbook: www.cab.ca.gov/publications.htm. They have a lot of useful information and publications on there as well.

And for those of you in our area looking for an Architect, this is our Architect’s website: http://www.mtn-arch.com/. He has an office in Big Bear and also one in Palm Springs. He’s the BEST! But don’t take our word for it, go and see and feel for yourself. If you have any questions specifically related to his services (Will he come to Los Angeles? Does he do work in Arizona?) please ask him, not me.

If you have any questions related to how happy (or not) we are with his services, feel free to send us an email. So far, we couldn’t be happier!

Now… to get that darn Boundary Survey out of the way.

Donating the Z-Tree house to the Fire Department

TREE's DIARY:

I went to the local fire department today to see about donating Z-Tree to them. Mike’s brother is a firefighter-in-training and he said a school in their neighborhood donated a building to their department. Evidently they can use it to practice tearing down walls, making holes in the ceilings, knocking down doors, etc. I think he said they were going to put up drywall and set fire to it so they get the full effect of a real burning building, and then practice putting it out. And when they’re done, they clean up the mess.

Which leaves us with a win-win situation. We need to demolish the house and get rid of all the leftover construction waste, and they could use a real house to practice on. So why not combine forces and benefit everyone?

Though I must admit, I was really looking forward to bashing down the walls and smashing through the concrete myself. I think Mike was too. It’s not very often you get to take a sledgehammer and go crazy.

Also, I have already turned Z-Tree into my own personal gym. I figured it would be months before we could tear it down so I moved my punching bag and weight bench over there. I’m not looking forward to carrying that 100 pound bag down that flight of stairs so soon! Well, to be more accurate, I’m not looking forward to asking Mike to carry that 100 pound bag down that flight of stairs.

Well, that’s where we stand now with our little project. The fire department said they’d get back to me after they meet with their Chief. In the meantime, we’re in the process of getting a land surveyor to come out and let us know where our boundary lines are, then we’ll get the preliminary plans back from our architect, submit the finals to our construction lender and hopefully will be able to start doing some physical labor this summer.

Yeah right.

So far, we’ve owned the property for almost 3 months and haven’t been able to do a single thing (of substance) to it other than cleaning it out. But all this prep work is necessary, I suppose, in order to make the real work (the actual construction) not only happen, but happen without too many problems along the way. At least we're hoping to start on the physical labor this summer.

Too many tangents!

TREE's DIARY:

Michael thinks I go off on too many tangents in my entries (notice how he’s Michael today and not Mike). “The bulk should be about the house with small tangents only to give a glimpse of you,” he says. While I agree with him about too many tangents, I can’t help it! I have so much to say! Life is just bursting with stuff to observe and comment on!

In my professional writing, I have to be precise, disciplined and eloquent. In my personal journal entries, I want to give myself the freedom of just going with whatever comes out and writing free flow. I spend all day editing myself, so when I get the chance to write strictly for my personal enjoyment, I want to let my fingers go as fast as they can without being interrupted every other word by that incessant writing critic within me. I don’t care if it reads well; I just want to express myself no holds barred. And most often, that’s how I think. One thought leads to another and before I know it, I don’t even remember what I was originally thinking about.

But alas, this blog is about the Z-Tree house, after all. Not about me.

Or maybe it IS about me? After all, isn’t everything in our lives a reflection of us? Doesn’t everything tie in together, somehow neatly connected, whether we see it or not?

Reminds me of something that happened to me when I was a kid.

Just kidding! I guess I can’t go off on a tangent while I’m defending my habit of going off on tangents, can I? Oh, but it’s sooo tempting! So before I go off on another one my many tangents, let me just stop writing.

Right now.

But wait! Who says Michael gets to be the boss of me? He’s not the boss of me! You hear that, Michael? YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME! I’m going to tangent you to death before this house is finished! Yeah, that’s right. I’m talking to you.

Ok, I feel better. Now I can stop.



MIKE's DIARY:

Oh dear, someone’s had too much coffee today.

Yes well our little Miss Tree does tend to wax rhapsodic (before you raise an eyebrow being all impressed and stuff, I got that phrase from the movie Roxanne). But that’s cool, it’s one of the things that has kept us friends for all these years. We can be so different when it comes to the way we express ourselves but we really “get” each other. Thank goodness because otherwise I’d be sneaking wax into my ear and just nodding a lot when I’m around her.

I’m sorry Tree, I was kidding, please put the shovel down.

That’s all for me. Been pulling a few 12 hour days so not much else going on for me in terms of the house.

First Architect Meeting (and a really long tangent or two)

TREE's DIARY:

Woo hoo! We’re moving right along! We finally have a construction lender squared away and just met with our architect this morning to hash out the details of the design. It will take two weeks to get the preliminary plans back to us.

I’m so excited! The meeting was just shy of 2 hours and we sat around a desk discussing and sketching out ideas. Well, actually, our architect did all the sketching while we watched and said, “oh yea, that’s good,” and “oh perfect!” I don’t think there was anything he suggested that we didn’t agree with. Maybe because we trust him or maybe because he shares our same vision but is better able to look at all the other factors involved that we wouldn’t know due to lack of inexperience. Either way, we both left his office feeling very excited and positive about what is to come. Most importantly, we felt that our wants and needs were being carefully considered and felt that we were all speaking the same language.

Have you ever tried to have a conversation with someone and for whatever reason neither of you understand the other even though you’re both speaking English? How frustrating is that?! How can two people who are speaking the exact same language not understand each other? Is it the language that lacks clarity, or is it the person using the language?

It is interesting to note that our architect is deaf and we had no problem communicating with each other.

When I was in college years ago, I took a sign language class. I’ve always been interested in communication and thought it might be fun and rewarding to become a sign language interpreter on the side, while pursuing my writing goals.

The first day of class, the professor showed up late. The students (myself included) were talking, laughing and being rowdy, as college students are, and when the professor walked in, we ignored him, expecting him to yell at us when he had settled in.

After pulling some paperwork from his briefcase and hanging his coat on the back of his chair, without a word, he went to the light switch by the door and flipped it off and on several times.
We became quiet and looked around at each other wondering what the heck he was doing. Was he testing the lights? They were obviously working as they were on when he walked in.

With our full attention, he went to the chalkboard and wrote his name. Then he pointed at the student sitting in the end of the front row and held out a piece of chalk. Still not a word. The student hesitated, searching her peers for help. But we offered none; we were just as perplexed as she was.

The professor pointed to himself, then his name on the chalkboard, then at the student again and held the chalk out toward her. The student slowly stood up, walked to the chalkboard, took the chalk and wrote her name. He smiled and nodded and pointed to the student beside her. This went on until everyone in the room had introduced themselves by writing their name on the board.

We learned quickly that our teacher was deaf. He never spoke a single word to us, but we came to understand everything he was teaching us. One of the most important things he taught us was that spoken language is not the only form of communication. He gave us various communication assignments in class, none of which allowed us to speak. One assignment was to tell an entire story to the class without opening our mouths. One student stood in front of the class and mimed a story while the class had to write down their understanding of the story. More often than not, most of the class understood the person miming. But there was more than miming. We learned to communicate using facial expressions, hand gestures (like the “thumbs up”), body language, written words, noises, vibrations (like slamming your foot on the floor), touch, physical actions, visual aids, etc.

As the class progressed and we learned to sign the alphabet, we started communicating by spelling out words with our hands that we couldn’t otherwise express with any of the above. Sometimes we cheated, of course, when his back was turned, and verbally said the word we were struggling to communicate. But it never failed, the class would erupt in laughter when someone blurted something out (usually out of frustration), and he would know, just by our reaction that the person had cheated. He would turn and flash them a sympathetic “I caught you” look.

As we learned to sign words and began putting them together in sentences, the class became more and more excited and many of us met in groups on our own time to practice our new form of communication. It was one of the more fun classes I have ever taken and one where the students worked together closely as a team. It felt as though we were one big family, all in it together, trying to figure out how to not only communicate words to each other, but truly understand one another.

Perhaps the most important lesson our professor taught us was that deaf people are people too. I know it sounds ridiculous, of course they are people, but I believe it is an unconscious sentiment shared by many hearing people. It certainly was with the members of my class. I would also venture to say that this ridiculous sentiment of ours spreads out to people with all kinds of disabilities. Personally, before I took this class, I used to get pretty uncomfortable when I saw someone with some form of obvious physical or mental impairment. Depending on the severity, I’m embarrassed to admit now, I still find myself a little uncomfortable.

Those of us who have no official disabilities or impairments simply don’t understand what it’s like. And because we don’t understand it, we tend to place it in a neat category, set aside and apart from us so we don’t have to deal with it… or more accurately, with ourselves. I use the term “official” because I believe many of us really are impaired; there just hasn’t been an official name for our impairment. If you’re not living a full life, to the best of your potential, isn’t that in itself an impairment? Many of us just drift along, like zombies almost, without truly feeling, being or living. We’re like the walking dead, our lives a stale repetition of outworn habits, our yesterdays blend into today and our todays blend into tomorrow, nothing new, nothing exciting, nothing real. To me, that’s the worst impairment anyone can have, to be living impaired. But we consider ourselves people, don’t we? Why is it that we think if someone is officially impaired that they are not like us? That they don’t have feelings, hopes, dreams, joy, pain, sorrow, struggles, achievements, love, sex, anger, fears, desires, needs?

When I was a kid, I saw a man in a grocery store whose face had been burned horribly. I was staring at him because I had never seen anything like it before. My mom whispered at me not to stare because it was rude. I didn’t listen to her because I was drawn to him out of sheer curiosity and fascination. I couldn’t help it. He turned toward me and caught me staring. I smiled. He smiled back. He had a beautiful, warm smile and I remember thinking it would be ok to ask him what happened. More than wanting to know what happened, I wanted to know how his life was. But my mom yanked me away and I never saw him again.

I’ll always remember his smile and his openness to a child’s curiosity. I didn’t stare to be rude. I was simply curious. There was no judgment on my part. I always wondered how he felt when well-intentioned people tried not to stare at him, to ignore him and go out of their way not to make him uncomfortable by noticing him, when it was really them who were probably the most uncomfortable. And it was really being noticed, as a human being, that he probably wanted the most. Why is it when someone isn’t “normal” like the rest of us, we pretend they’re invisible? And why on earth do we think this makes them feel better? Maybe it merely serves to make us feel better.

I think, as a society, we need to talk about these things. We need to increase our awareness about disabilities, impairments, disfigurements, handicaps, whatever that is foreign to us and makes us uncomfortable. We need to break out of our ignorance and explore our feelings, our thoughts, our fears, our prejudices. We need to challenge ourselves and overcome our ridiculous taboos. We need to communicate and listen to each other and aim to understand one another. Only when we openly and honestly talk about how we feel can we work together and become a whole. It may not be comfortable, but what good is being comfortable if we’re not being real? Let’s be genuine, let’s eliminate the ways we separate each other by our classification system of categorizing people, let’s rise to the unconditionally loving and connected human beings that we truly are.

Let’s all learn to speak the same language, no matter who we are or what our background is. If we start with honesty, especially with ourselves, we are off to a great start.


MIKE's DIARY:

So we met with our architect and it was a very positive experience. I can only hope when it comes time for any of you to go through this you have someone like our guy. He really listened to all our ideas, wacky or otherwise, and explained to us how everything worked. What I mean is, he didn’t say “That’s not a good idea.” What he did was take whatever we suggested, actually draw it out, explained the pros and cons and let us make up our own minds. I really appreciated that.

So we’re off to a good start. We expect to see our first draft of the official plans in about a week or two. Once we’re happy they go to the city for their approval. About that time we submit the plans to our home construction loan company so they can assess the value of the home and establish the loan amount. We’ll also be needing permits from the city not only to build this house but to tear down the existing one. Can you hear our savings account screaming? (Actually, thank goodness for this loan, it’s making everything possible.)

I have never been in debt before. I’m not kidding, in my entire life I’ve made maybe TWO interest payments on my credit cards. Oh wait…damn, I’m totally lying, I had school loans. OK, so I have been in debt. Hated it. I can’t stand paying interest, that’s why I’ve always paid things off as soon as I could. I remember now with my school loans, virtually every penny I made when I got my first job went into paying them off, which I did in a matter of months. Once I did I was amazed at how fast my savings account grew. It was an awesome feeling. But this is unavoidable. We won’t feel it at first because I think we’re going to defer our payments, but it’ll hit us when we’re done with the house.

Owner/Builder Construction Loans

TREE's DIARY:

Wow! A whole new world has opened up for me in Real Estate! Just when you think you know everything, you discover that you barely know anything!

As you all know, I’ve been talking to lenders and brokers the past couple of weeks in search of a good loan for our new construction. I thought I had it all figured out in terms of the lending industry, but this owner/builder lending business is a whole other ballgame.

We’ve narrowed it down to two different lenders. Actually, one is a lender, the other is a broker. (If you don’t know the difference, see my Basic Real Estate Terms. If you want to learn more about mortgage lending, see A Word About Lenders and Brokers).

An owner/builder construction loan is a loan that is granted to an owner of a property who wants to build the house themselves, or at least act as their own general contractor. It is not necessary to be a licensed contractor, but most lenders require you to hire a licensed contractor or a site supervisor to oversee the project.

Since Mike & I are neither licensed nor have any experience as a site supervisor, we’re going to need to hire one. The good thing is the lender does not care if we hire a friend who qualifies nor whether we pay them, as long as we enter into a contract with them that they will oversee our entire project from start to finish.

In addition, many new construction loans allow you to withhold all payments during the term of the construction! The interest is still accrued; however, no payments on principal or interest are required until the house is finished. They set up a reserve interest account by calculating a percentage of the amount borrowed at the stated interest rate by the term of the loan and add it onto the amount of the loan. While this technically means we will be paying interest on the interest, it also means we have no payments while we build. We calculated the total interest we’d be paying by the end of our construction term and it works in our favor in the long run based on our needs at this time.

While we are getting a construction to permanent loan, which means once we finish construction, the loan rolls into a conventional mortgage loan and we don’t have to refinance or pay a second set of closing costs, we are planning on refinancing to ING Direct anyway, unless they can offer us a better rate. The current rate for our construction loan is between 6 and 6.75%, once it rolls over, it should be more conforming.

Another great thing is that since we already put money down when we bought the property, we can use that existing equity as well as the money we pay the Architect to cover the down payment. The closing costs will be rolled into the loan and we will not have any out-of-pocket costs up front.

Construction loans are basically reimbursement loans. You are approved for a certain amount of money, then as you buy materials and build, you draw upon that approved amount bit by bit as you go along and are reimbursed that draw amount back into your pocket. You only accrue interest on the amount that you have drawn at any given time, not the amount that you were approved for.

I really love learning about this industry and the more I learn, the more I find that I really love the industry itself. I love Real Estate investing. It’s frustrating at times, but it’s so fascinating to me. Everything from the financial lending institutions to the buying and selling to the building and remodeling. It’s all so much fun! Maybe that’s why Monopoly was always my favorite game growing up. That, and Twister!

So far, Mike has been pretty removed from this process; he doesn’t enjoy it as much as I do. I think it’s important in any partnership to know what each person’s qualities are and maximize them.

Mike is really good at design. It’s hard for me to envision something unless I’ve seen it somewhere else. He’s the one who basically designed our initial plans. He was so into it and spent hours in Excel creating and tweaking. I was a little bored to be honest. He has wonderful grand ideas but hates sorting out the details to make them happen. I love the little details. I love research and discovery. He’d rather say, “Here’s a good idea, go make it happen.” I’d rather say, “Now there’s a good idea, I’m going to make it happen.” Maybe that’s why we work so well together in this business venture.

So far.


MIKE's DIARY:

Yes, that is true. So when my entries mysteriously stop, don’t believe her when she says I disappeared while hiking in the mountains, you can bet we finally stopped “working well” and I’m probably buried somewhere up in them thar hills.

But hats off to Tree. Seriously, she’s put so much damn work into all the excruciating details of this project it just boggles my mind. I’d like to say it’s because I work so many hours and am just too tired at the end of the day to focus but honestly I don’t think I could keep myself interested in this stuff even if I didn’t have a job.

I feel bad sometimes because I really do want to help and be a part of this, and I know I am (I’m not a total slug) but compared to the amount of research this woman has done my efforts pale in comparison. Thank God she likes me.

So far.

Money and Relationships

TREE's DIARY:

Whoa. 26% APR? No thank you! I’ve been flooded with emails from lenders since posting yesterday’s entry. It appears there are many out there who are willing to fund without all the “strict requirements” I mentioned yesterday. But somehow they all seem to want a CRAZY amount of interest! Ranging anywhere from 13% to 26% with up to 7 points charged up front! One of the lenders said he will even send a man out every month to my front door to collect their payment. Talk about excellent customer service!

(Just kidding, I’m not that naïve. I’ve seen The Godfather.)

Thanks to all who responded but we’re not that desperate.

Yet.

So far we have some good prospects in line, just waiting for some additional information from each of them. Our best prospect offers a great interest rate (5%) but requires a down payment. Since we just had to dish out 10% down to buy the house and another $8K for the plans as well as another set of closing costs for the construction loan, we’re weighing our options with another lender who offers 100% financing but has a higher interest rate. Mike and I just have to sit down and reevaluate our immediate goals vs. our long-term goals and our finances and see which option will work best for both of us.

Speaking of Mike, I want to add a bit of a personal note here since I’ve always been warned about mixing friendship with money. I know it’s still pretty early in our new business partnership and who knows how we’ll feel about each other a year from now. Maybe his body parts will end up in our cement foundation by the time we’re done.

People always say to never go into business with a friend or relative because it will ruin the relationship. They say to keep finances and money as far away from relationships as possible. Some people even have adamant rules against loaning money to a relative or friend. Personally, I think that’s absolutely RIDICULOUS!

I grew up in a close-knit family with 2 sisters. As we ventured out on our own, we often relied on each other when one of us fell upon hard financial times. Our money flowed back and forth, giving and receiving at any given point throughout the years. Sometimes I’d have a good job while my sister struggled through college and I gave her money to get by. Then sometimes she’d have the good job while I struggled to pay rent and she gave me money. Sometimes hardship befell all of us at the same time and we’d call our parents for help. No one ever turned anyone down and none of us kept track of what we gave the other, no matter how little we had. Helping our loved one was important to us, not the money.

This free flow of help wasn’t limited to immediate family. It spread out to include our extended family like in-laws, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. In fact, here’s a perfect story to make my point.
When I was 19, I moved to Florida to pursue a goal. I was just starting out fresh in the world with no savings and no significant experience living on my own. I needed a car to get to work every day and I needed deposit money to get an apartment. My sisters and parents all happened to be going through a rough time so my mom suggested borrowing money from her sister since she was flourishing in her new business. My aunt sent me a check for $1200 immediately (at that time, it was enough to buy a used car and get an apartment) with no questions asked. Two years later, I was finally out of my rut and making a decent amount of money so I sent her a check returning her $1200. She never cashed it.

That was 14 years ago.

Two weeks ago, my mom called me and told me that my aunt’s car broke down and she doesn’t have the money to fix it and she can’t get to work to make the money to pay for it. I asked how much she needed and would you believe, it was exactly $1200? I immediately sent her a check for the full amount. This time she cashed it.

Life is a yo-yo. Sometimes you’re up, sometimes you’re down. When you’re down, it’s good to know you have someone who is loving and generous enough to offer you a hand to get back up. When you’re up, it’s good to know YOU can be that loving and generous person who can offer your hand to help someone get back up.

I would recommend to anyone to forget about the value of money and focus more on the value of helping others. Because it truly pays, in more ways than you can imagine!

But I digress. There was something I wanted to say about Mike.

We have been friends for five years. We’ve been through quite a lot together and have seen each other at some pretty low points and always, we’ve remained friends and became even stronger friends after having gone through it together. This is the first time we’re mixing money into our friendship. And in a BIG way too. We’re getting knocked left and right for money here and money there ever since day 1 with this house. Throughout all our little challenges so far we’ve been able to support each other and work it out. He’ll make a compromise here; I’ll make a compromise there.

When you go through something challenging with another person, you get to know them pretty quickly and pretty well. How people handle adversity is often the best way to find out who they really are, what really makes them. While I wouldn’t categorize this house experience as adversarial in the least, it is quite challenging and puts us both right up front, on the line. I realized this morning after talking to him that we’re much better friends today than we were a month ago. And we were pretty good friends to begin with! I never really thought it could get any better.

Since we’re pooling our resources together for the Z-Tree house, he knows exactly how much I have in my accounts and vice versa. I have never shared this info with a boyfriend, let alone a friend! It certainly brings a different level of intimacy & trust into our friendship.

So far it has been well worth it to mix money and friendship. It has not only proven to offer us a solid financial return on our investment, it has also proven to offer us a solid personal return on our friendship.

And to me, that is more important than all the money in the world.

Construction Loans

TREE's DIARY:

It turns out that finding a construction loan is quite complicated. Well, let me rephrase that. It turns out that finding a suitable construction loan is quite complicated.

This is what we’ve been told so far. In order to get an owner-builder construction loan (a loan in which the homeowner can act as their own contractor & builder), we must have a free and clear title to the house. If I understand correctly, the reason for this is the construction lender does not want to be in second position in the event of a default. For example, if they loan us money to build the house and half way through we decide to make a run for the border, the lender in first position (our mortgage holder – this is lender #4 for those who’ve been following our story) will be able to reclaim their funds in the form of this house, but the construction lender will not. So it becomes a huge risk for them to loan to someone who cannot grant them any security in the event of a default (in this case, first position on the house).

A construction lender I spoke with on the phone told me that if it was just land with no house then he would be able to loan us the amount for the construction as well as the amount to pay off the current loan on the land, thereby putting them in first position. But since there is a house on the land, they cannot. I don't know why they can't do the same if there is a house there. I asked him if we hung up the phone, I went and demolished the house today then called him back tomorrow, would he be able to loan then, since it would be just land?

He thought that was quite funny. But I was quite serious.

It turns out that even if he could loan, our mortgage lender would surely demand immediate payment of their loan balance if they found out the house had been demolished. Since they loaned us the money based on the value of the home, it would not be worth as much without the home, and therefore, they would be losing quite a bit if we made a run for the border. I asked him how they would find out if we didn’t tell them. He said they would know when we pull the demolition permit.

Demolition permit? We need one of those too? Geez. Do I need a permit to sneeze on my property??

And in the event the mortgage lender happens to not find out when we pull the permit, they would surely find out when the insurance company cancels our home insurance policy due to having a non-existent home.

“And how would they find out?” I asked.

The guy just chuckled. In all seriousness, I was just curious. I think I’m a pretty daring risk-taker, but when it comes to stuff like this, I’m a straight by the book kind of gal. I’m not sure but I think that would be along the lines of mortgage fraud and insurance fraud and isn’t that a felony?

No, thank you. Not for me. I love life too much to be holed up in some concrete slab with iron bars.

Anyway, this lender seemed pretty willing to humor me and my incessant curiosity so I asked if there was any other way to approach this. Mike came up with the idea that if we kept one wall up, perhaps we could get a renovation loan instead of a construction loan, which seems to have less restrictions. The lender said he’d work out some scenarios with his team and get back to us.

All the lenders we spoke to were in agreement that we would have to have plans drawn up first before they could loan so that they can have an appraisal done of the proposed finished property and see how much it would be worth. This helps them come up with a maximum amount they would loan us to ensure they get their money back if we default.

My fears came back when I heard this. We were hoping to get the loan first to cover the cost of the plans. We have the money for it in our savings but what if we pay $8400 for the plans and then are unable to get the construction loan? Then we’d have a beautiful paper house but no money to build it. I guess we could always frame our blueprints and stare at them and dream. It all makes perfect sense and if I was a lender, I would require the same thing. But dammit, why can’t people just give us lots of money and go away?? :-)

I’m happy to report that the fears lasted only a few brief minutes. I caught them as they surfaced and released them into the mysterious void where thoughts go after they’ve been thought. I chose more positive thoughts to come through. We will get a loan. There is no “what if.” In some way or another, the funds will come to us and we will build our house. We have an infinite source of wealth available whenever we want. We have an infinite source of wealth available whenever we want. We have an infinite source of wealth available whenever we want. We have an infinite…

Selecting an Architect

TREE's DIARY:

Mike touched briefly on the architectural meetings in his last entry and I want to expand on it because I think it’s important to pick the right people to help you along your way, no matter what you’re doing in life.

In our case, the first architect I met (Mike’s in L.A. working so couldn’t come up for this) was an absolute pleasure! I’ve never met with an architect before so I had no idea what to expect. When he arrived, I showed him our plans (the ones posted in the photos section) as a starting point to give him an idea of what we like.

As he walked through the house and around the property, he threw out ideas that might work better based on the layout of the land, the things we wanted, etc. He told us that if we wanted to build the house the way we had drawn it, we would have to build a retaining wall which would cost upwards of $20K because our plans required excavating and leveling part of the mountain. This was a very good piece of information because we certainly wouldn’t have thought of that!

He also pointed something out to us that I am in absolute awe neither Mike nor I noticed. Why, I have no idea, considering we’ve been up to the house numerous times, taken a million pictures and stared at the view for long stretches at a time. Our plan of the house maximized the best view of the property, or so we thought. We created the entire south facing wall with tall windows for this express purpose. But when the architect looked around our property and looked at our plans, he saw that we had placed the wood burning stove in the exact spot where the best view really is. He pointed it out to me and when I looked up at the southeast corner of the property, I was amazed that he was right. The southeast corner is indeed the best view. It’s the “money shot.” I’ve seen this view before, I’ve even taken pictures of it… in fact, I even posted it in one of our entries and titled it “View from deck.” So why hadn’t we thought to maximize this view instead?

I have no idea! Perhaps because the existing house has a corner covering the view, I guess we didn’t think to change it. I really don’t know, but it’s one of those things you wonder in retrospect how you were able to miss it. It’s like looking all over for your car keys and can’t finding it for the life of you and then you look on the counter where you’ve looked five times before already but this time it’s there. Weird.

Another thing he suggested was to work with the land instead of against it. Our plan requires quite a bit of excavating because of the slope. He suggested leaving the land as is and building the house to suit the land by creating multiple levels. In essence, a split-level home.

I don’t know much about building, but this seems so much more in alignment with my spiritual practice. Work WITH the Universe, not AGAINST it. Go WITH the flow, not AGAINST it. It makes absolute sense to me and simply “feels” better to think about working with our mountain’s terrain instead of cutting into it and transforming it into something else to suit our whims. There’s something Zen-like in this way of building that appeals to me.

All in all, this first architect and his partner took their time to listen to what I had to say (we women LOVE this!), took our wants & needs into consideration and gave their suggestions based on their expertise of what might work or not. And when it worked, they took their time to explain what might be involved if we do it that way and offered alternative ways in order to maximize our money.

Their quote was $8,400.

Being the first architect we met with, we had a bit of sticker shock and decided to do our due diligence by meeting with others. In my heart though, I was already attached to this one. In a way, meeting with the others, there was a part of me that hoped they couldn’t match (or beat) the first team’s expertise, energy and price.

The second architect came, looked at our plans for about 5 seconds and simply said, “sure, those are fine,” then handed them back to me. I had been honest with him on the phone before he came out and told him we had met with someone else previously and were researching our options, so I figured perhaps he wasn’t putting in too much effort because he didn’t feel we were serious and were merely “shopping around.” Understandable, but I was not about to pay $130 (his fee to come out) to have someone say, “sure, those are fine,” and leave it at that!

When I asked him to clarify what he meant by “fine,” he said he could draw up our plans exactly as is, no problems. To me, it didn’t seem like 5 seconds would be enough time to study the plan details, run all the structural & architectural functions in your head and come up with such finite certainty, but I’m not an architect so what do I know. I explained that we had never done this before and I was a little surprised we got it right on our first try. So I tried again for confirmation. I said, “so this house works?” and I handed him the plans again. Another 5 seconds, then “sure, it works.” Nothing more. I decided not to push it because after all, he was probably right.

The house we designed probably does work on the lot. It just might not be the BEST house for the lot we have. And that’s what I was looking for. I was looking for him to give me his expert advice on what might be better, what might work more compatibly with the terrain, what might cost more or less and generally anything more than simply “sure, those are fine.”

I determined that if he even quoted me $1,000 to draw up our plans that I would not be comfortable going with him. I guess it’s like having a friend who goes along with you on everything and is never honest enough to tell you when you’re doing something really wrong or hurtful toward someone else or anything that might help you become a better person. I love for my friends to challenge me, to call me on my sh*t and tell me when they think I’m acting against my true self. This is how we learn and evolve and be real with each other. I don’t want an architect who’s going to draw plans on a house simply because his client wants a house like that. If it’s not the best house for the lot, tell me.

So I was a bit relieved to hear his price was $15,000.

The third architect felt like a McDonald’s drive-through. At least the other two architects guaranteed their continued involvement in our project, should we need to call upon them. This one would draw up our plans (exactly the way we want them) and send us on our merry way. No input, no ideas, no nothing, really, just paper. We give him our plans, he recreates them in official professional looking “plan format” in CAD, autographs them and the deal is done.

His cost was $4,000.

I’m sure there are other architects out there who would be a lot more in alignment with what we’re looking for than the last two, but frankly, why go around the world searching for something when you know you’re going to end up right back where you started finding the very thing you’ve been searching for?

Perhaps we would find someone better and less expensive, perhaps we won’t. But we have a good feeling about the first one and when we pay them, we’ll feel good about it, not only because we are getting good use value for our money but also because we genuinely like them as human beings. When you dish out a significant amount of money, feeling good about it is absolutely essential!

So now our next step is to secure an owner/builder construction loan and then hopefully soon we’ll be able to finally start the actual process of mass destruction and creation!

True Commitment

TREE's DIARY:

Since my metaphoric epiphany yesterday, I’ve been much more certain about the choices we’re making on this house. I guess I was still resisting the idea of tearing down and building up. If you remember, we started out on this journey thinking we would spend about $10-20K to merely “fix up” the existing house and flip it. Our plan from the beginning was to make a good return on our investment within a year. That was it.

Since then, we’ve fallen in love with the potential of the house and are now spending 6 figures to rebuild it along with the added complication of my moving in when it’s all said and done (which means not a single penny returned on our investment for years to come).

Our initial plan required only digging into our savings for some drywall, paint, and perhaps hardwood flooring if we got ambitious. Our new plan requires securing a construction loan to finance the cost of building an entire house from ground up. It’s quite a large undertaking neither of us had planned. But as Mike says, “When life throws you a gift, you have to take it and run with it.”

So finally, this morning, after having written my entry yesterday, I committed to running with this gift as far as I can. I thought I had committed to it weeks ago but I was wrong. I was still resisting. And once you’ve fully committed, there IS no resistance. My resistance expressed itself in ways that limited the house’s potential. I didn’t want to pay so much for the plans. I was willing to settle for cheaper plans even though that meant building a smaller, generic home. I didn’t want to spend too much and was willing to compromise the potential of the house just to save a few bucks. All this because I did not commit to going all the way, to following this project through to its entirety.

Amazing how easy it is to commit to something when it’s within your comfort zone and doesn’t require much of a stretch. In my case, $10-20K. But the moment it goes beyond it (and boy, does this one go faaaaaaaar beyond), I shrink back. I reach out desperately grasping anything I can to get back to my trusted zone of comfort before it’s too late, before it gets too far beyond my reach. Then one day you just wake up and you KNOW what you must do. And you let go. You release your grip and settle into your newfound peace and inner conviction that in the end…

Everything will be ok.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m still terrified as hell, but I’m enjoying the terror now. I love this feeling of uncertainty in the process. I love this feeling of challenging myself and doing something exciting, worthwhile and utterly INSANE!

Spiritual Ponderings

TREE's DIARY:

What a week it has been! Mike and I are back in our “WHAT THE HELL DID WE DO?” phase. I met with some architects this week and have been quoted upwards of $15,000 for plans!!! Our first quote was for $8,000 and I thought that was insane until I heard $15,000! I’m surprised my eyes managed to remain in their sockets. I am sooooooo in the wrong business!

We NEVER thought we would have to dish out THOUSANDS of dollars before we can even lift a hammer to our house! Yesterday I was so discouraged that I went to the house and hammered some nails like a maniac into the back deck (sorry Mike, those were the same nails you spent all day pulling out last week). I just couldn’t help myself! It was either sit calmly and meditate or beat the $#%! out of some nails. And I was in no mood to be still and transcend.

I know it’s pointless as the deck is going to be torn down anyway, but it made me feel better. It made me feel as though I had some control over my own house. The truth is I really do. But it doesn’t seem that way right now when we have to pay others and get permission before we can legally do anything to it! Sometimes I feel like a child throwing a tantrum & pounding my fists on the floor yelling, “But it’s not fair! I don’t wanna do it that way! Waaaaaaah!”

Deep down, I know the RIGHT way to do it is exactly the way we’re doing it. Spend the money, follow the procedures, get the permits, build it right. I mean, we’re not building a miniature toothpick house with Elmer’s Glue to keep the walls in place. We’re building an entire friggin’ house from ground up! We NEED to listen to the Bldg. & Safety Inspector. We NEED to listen to an architect. We NEED to rely on others who know what the heck they’re doing otherwise we put ourselves and our neighbors’ lives at risk. And it’s just not worth it to save money.

It’s so hard to remain focused on the bigger picture and not lose yourself in the tiny minutia that pops up along the way. The bigger picture is a beautiful house in a beautiful location and doing justice to the amazing opportunity we were given. The tiny minutia is the money, energy and work that go into fulfilling the bigger picture.

While I’m merely releasing some angst right now, I really do love this process. It’s such a wonderful learning experience all around, even when it’s stressful. In fact, perhaps more so when it’s stressful. It challenges me, forces me to look at myself and my reactions, acknowledge my fears and hopefully overcome them.

I think this house has become a metaphor for my life. I sat on the deck yesterday (after pounding it full of nails) and stared at the house, taking it all in. I was talking to it and asking it for answers (the things we do when we’re desperate). And though I’m happy to report no voice spoke back to me, I must admit, I did get some answers.

All my life I have struggled to break out of this shell called “Terri.” Everything that I learned from my parents, from society, from others, I have always felt to be a little “off.” I know, down to the very core of my being, that I am magnificent, pure, infinite, unbounded and valuable. How many of us have grown up with this ingrained into our being? I would venture to guess very few. Instead we are taught that we are small, flawed, imperfect and not good enough. We struggle, toil & strive to find our place in this world, to be someone and do something worthwhile, something with real meaning. We wander aimlessly hoping to discover a purpose, some higher value to our existence, and fulfill it.

I mean, how sad is it to think that THIS is all there is. Struggling to pay bills, working overtime, collecting material possessions, watching TV, etc. What if mediocrity is all there is for us? What if there is no higher purpose? What if we’re not here for a reason? What if this is it?

What a frightful thought. I’d rather drop dead right now if that were the case. But fortunately, I don’t believe it is. We do have a purpose. We are here for a deeper reason. We are here to discover the wonderment and beauty of our true glorious selves. We are like Gods in disguise and we have fallen into the illusion that we are the actual disguise and not the God we really are. We have forgotten our true state. We have been given an opportunity, as human beings, to explore, seek & rediscover ourselves again. We have been given an opportunity to break out of our limiting disguises, our shells, and claim our true magnificence once and for all.

But every time we try, it seems something, life, gets in the way and we forget, we get caught up in the disguise again until someone or something comes along to remind us, to set off this little spark we once felt burning inside. And we start off on our plight again only to get knocked down by something or someone else.

Each one of these things or people that come along to knock us down are actually other Gods in disguise. No matter how hard they knock you down, they are really there to help you grow and evolve. To help you strengthen your body, mind and spirit, to help you build integrity, courage and faith, to help you BECOME who you already are beyond the disguise.

We must keep getting up, no matter how hard or how many times we fall or get knocked down. We must never stop, we must urge on and keep going, keep growing at all costs.

I believe this house is the Universe’s way of reigniting that spark within me. Just as I must give myself every opportunity I can to fulfill my potential and never allow myself to settle for mediocrity, I must do the same for this house.

All I see when I look at it is potential. Not many other houses have that hold on me. For some reason, this one does… it touches something inside me… it calls me. And perhaps it is for that reason that I am scared to death! This house urges me to do it justice, it challenges me, inspires me and beckons me to step up to the call, to stretch myself far beyond my comfort zone and do something that both terrifies and excites me all at the same time.

Given that, $15,000 doesn’t seem like much anymore.


MIKE's DIARY:

So Tree and I are at an interesting place right now. We’re getting our first real taste of the kind of surprises I KNOW we’re in store for on this little adventure. We met with some architects to discuss our original plans for the house—I call them “original” plans because, my friends, they are gonna change. Basically it was like being asked to go back to the beginning, do not pass GO, do not collect $200. There are so many little (and by little I mean big) details that just don’t surface until you actually get started on the project. Here we are at Step 1 and already we’re scratching our heads in either confusion or disbelief. At the end of the day it was pretty clear that our plans were not entirely efficient or cost-effective. It was hard for me to let them go, but go they must.

To tell you the truth, I thought I’d be much more heartbroken about trashing our plans. I mean, we did spend hours creating them and refining them. I think they’re beautiful and can’t tell you how proud I am of them! But when we heard it will cost $8-15,000 for the plans, lord knows what else for the city to approve & permit, then $20,000 just to build a retaining wall!!! Well you can imagine how fast I got over our beautiful plans! Buh-bye!

Don’t get me wrong, I still love our “original” plans, and I’ll always be proud that we put the work we did into them. (Tree will post a copy of them so you can see our home that will never be.) But we aren’t Rockefellers and that $20K is needed elsewhere. Besides, as we design our new plans have faith that Tree & I will do us all proud. Our new house plans will be great. We have some great new ideas based off suggestions one of the architects gave us so I’m not feeling bad about this at all. I hope Tree isn’t either. I really do see this as one of the many challenges we’re going to face and quite frankly I bet it’s one of the easier hurdles we’re going to face.

And Tree, as for you smackin’ the hell out of those nails I pulled into the back deck, you go right ahead. Violence is very therapeutic. Men have known this for ages, always to the scorn and condemnation of women throughout the world! But we defend our need to hit things, watch action flicks, play rough sports and ogle women to the bitter end! (The ogling thing isn’t so much a part of the violence as it is just plain necessary.) I only hope that you washed your hands afterwards because more than a few of those nails were in direct contact with rat turd. I would have warned you had I known you were going to get in touch with your inner Charles Bronson.

Building & Safety Inspection

TREE's DIARY:

The Bldg & Safety inspector came this morning. It was great to talk to him. He said he had visited our house several times in the past few years and knew it well. Evidently the previous owner had some problems getting permits for it. We asked a lot of questions, jotted down a lot of notes and finally feel an inkling of certainty about our project. He was pretty honest and said we had a lot of hard work ahead of us but wasn’t discouraging in any form. He said we’d be seeing quite a bit more of him as he’ll be with us every step of the way and if we ever had any questions or got stuck, we could call him out for an “information inspection.” This is included in the price of the permits. It makes me feel good that someone who has actual experience in this sort of thing will be around to check our progress with each step and can point out any critical errors either before we make them or before they become too costly to fix.

It also gives me a different perspective about the infamous “permit enforcers.” I’ve heard so many horror stories that have made these people out to be heartless monsters with only one mission: to take your money. Perhaps I’m a little naïve, but I didn’t get that feeling from him. The feeling I got was that he was genuinely trying to help us build a safe, sound and habitable home. Not only for ourselves but also for our neighbors who may be affected if our house suddenly slips off its foundation and slides down the hill. This is far from the “they are the enemy” mentality I’ve been hearing from homeowners about them. I feel good about our inspector and only time will tell if he’s a heartless monster disguised as a human being. But for now, I choose to believe he’s our friend and will be there to support our project.

Our next step is to find an engineer who will sign off on our plans & create blueprints for us. The inspector winced when we told him we heard it would cost upwards of $10,000. He said it should cost us no more than $4K based on our description of what we wanted to do with the house. Mike is on his way home and most likely will not be back for a couple of weeks. In the meantime, I’ve been appointed the task of meeting with the engineer and explaining our plans to him. It will most likely take a few weeks for this process to complete anyway. I have no idea how long it takes for them to draw up plans once they visit the location, but after that, we’ll need to wait for the Bldg & Safety Dept. to approve them and then we can start building. Maybe by then the snow storms will be over for the season.

More snow!

TREE's DIARY:

I wish I could tell you that today we finally got to tear out some walls, bash in some concrete and shred up some carpeting. But I would be lying. Today we basically stayed inside my house, hovered around the fireplace and watched out the window as the snow pounded us. Not much else to be done when Mother Nature refuses to cooperate except enjoy it and make the most of it. So Mike and I used our cabin fever to redesign the house and come up with a comprehensive working draft of our plans. Turns out we’re going to build a 2 story, 3 bedroom house with vaulted ceilings, a sunken dining room with open kitchen downstairs and a living room upstairs that looks down onto the dining room. We’re also adding a study upstairs by the master bedroom that looks out into the forest. I have always wanted a study with book-lined walls from floor to ceiling and a wooden ladder on wheels that slides along the walls, like in old libraries!

I lost the battle for my wrap around decks but won the battle for an open bathroom plan. Mike really wanted a wall separating the shower/tub from the toilet & sink, in case we ever have guests who want to use the bathroom at the same time. Personally, with a bathroom on each floor, I don’t see how that might become much of a problem. And if it ever gets to the point where one person absolutely CANNOT wait for either bathroom to become available, I’d say privacy would be the least of their concerns.

My next battle with Mike will be for log siding. I think it fits perfectly in this environment. He agrees that it fits, but he doesn’t quite like the look. Maybe we’ll find a comparable exchange somewhere along the way.

His family’s neighbors bought a huge $600 slab of marble for their kitchen counter tops. They leaned it against their garage wall outside until they could move it in, but the wind kicked up and knocked it over, breaking it. We anticipate problems to arise and have decided that we are each allowed a $1,000 mistake without the other person getting angry. Anything beyond that, watch out!

Nails and Bolts

TREE's DIARY:

Five hours. That’s how long it took me to unscrew 10 bolts from the upper deck! The bolts were not only frozen over but also had a thick coating of paint around it, making for a difficult nut removal.

Waking up this morning, I had envisioned a similar scene to the movie “Ghost” when Demi Moore & Patrick Swayze ravaged the walls of their new artist’s loft. I had come prepared with my hammer and work gloves, ready to spend the day wreaking havoc on the interior walls, excited to release my inner barbarian. But instead, I spent hour after hour idly twisting and churning and straining to loosen a measly little nut from a measly little bolt.

Compared to bashing through cement walls, these bolts were MEASLY! But in the world of bolts, they were the mother of all bolts. They were a good 6 inches long and about ½ inch in diameter. I didn’t even know they made bolts that big.

After five hours of work and ten bolts later, I felt unsatisfied. I knew we had spent a good chunk of time working but it didn’t seem like much had been done. I guess I thought tearing down a house would take no preparation, just a lot of bashing walls, ripping carpet, smashing concrete and all around frenzied destruction with a sledgehammer! But as it turns out, there’s a lot more to demolishing a building than the actual demolition. There’s a lot of prep work involved. So until then, I’ll continue to beat up my punching bag.


MIKE's DIARY:

We were determined to get something done today. The weather was better today so after breakfast we gathered tools and made our way up to Z-Tree. We spent a solid 5 hours up there but didn’t get that much done. I mean we worked the whole time, Tree was removing bolts from the 2nd floor deck and I was pulling drywall nails from the exposed boards inside but at the end of the day we looked around and everything looked the same. Drag! It’s nice to see something change when you work for 5 hours, but we didn’t get that. I know I pulled a shit-load of nails (I kept a pile so I could see what I had done) but it wasn’t very satisfying.

We have high hopes for tomorrow but it’s supposed to storm again so that will hurt us. I’d love to get the railing down from the 2nd floor but it gets damn cold outside when it’s snowing. I ain’t Grizzly Adams… when it’s cold I want to be inside!

Snow Play

TREE's DIARY:

My morning started with what sounded and felt like an earthquake. It was 9:45, I was in bed and suddenly heard loud rumbling and pounding. You get used to a variety of strange noises living in the mountains, from squirrels squabbling on your roof to trees howling in the wind. But this was a noise I had never heard here before and got up to see what was going on. It turned out to be Mike running into the living room to turn on the TV. He had overslept and was 15 minutes late for the new animated Batman series on the WB. In other words, Saturday morning cartoons! I must admit, after 5 years of friendship, I’ve never seen him so excited! It’s been awhile since I watched Saturday morning cartoons, but man, have things changed! Cartoons are much more sophisticated now; they seem to have lost that "innocent" edge. Whatever happened to Tom & Jerry and Scooby Doo?

It stormed pretty much all day. We had hail, snow, rain, sleet, wind, you name it, we had it. So needless to say, we spent the day shoveling snow. First we had to shovel ourselves out of my driveway and then we had to shovel ourselves in to our driveway at the Z-Tree house.

Since this is Mike’s first big storm up here, we decided to spend as much time in it as possible. We didn’t want to be cooped up in the house and miss all the beauty around us, so instead of working on the house, we spent all day outside. From shoveling to climbing trees to making snow angels and sledding, it was a pretty fun day. But certainly unproductive for the Z-Tree house!


MIKE's DIARY:

It took me 5.5 hours to drive up here last night. Five and one half HOURS! It was a combination of rain screwing up the freeway and snow slowing down the mountain traffic, but oh good Lord was that a long drive. I did get to put my chains on for the first time which, as tough as it is, was pretty fun. There was a spot on the road where everyone was pulling over to put chains on so I thought I’d do the same. You just don’t mess around with slippery streets on mountain roads!

What amazed me was the number of people who not only did not know how to put chains on but who put them on really poorly! I would see people drive off with their chains wobbling around ready to fall off or already starting to get tangled in their axle. Not 60 yards down the road there were 3 cars involved in accidents. Add that to what delayed me.

So Saturday stormed like a mother. We got it all up here, snow, rain, hail and wind—it was cool. But it kept us from getting very much done. We ended up shoveling snow from Tree’s driveway and the driveway at our house. Then we just goofed around. Tree mentioned my cartoon thing this morning. Well I happen to LOVE batman so I make no excuses. Batman is cool.

Building Permits

TREE's DIARY:

We’re finally going to start tearing down the house this weekend. We’ve been doing a lot of research this past month to ensure that we don’t knock it all down only to find out after the fact that we made a huge mistake. Good thing because we discovered that we need to leave one wall up in order to call it a “remodel” instead of a “new construction.” New construction means higher taxes assessed and who wants to pay higher taxes?

We also decided to get all the permits required, which we were not planning to do initially. I don’t know if I mentioned our permit situation in a previous entry, but basically the entire house is unpermitted. We found this out during the disclosure phase of escrow. I called the Building & Safety Division for our area and asked them to fax me all the permits they had on the house. They faxed 2 expired permits and one pending. That was it. I called them back and told them I only received part of the fax and the other valid permits did not come through. The lady there laughed and said that was all they had on the house. I asked her what about the existing valid permits and she said, “Honey, if I didn’t fax it to you, it doesn’t exist,” which means there are no valid permits for the house!

Fortunately I’ve been living in these mountains for 9 months and have, by now, become accustomed to the laid back way things work up here. Had I still been in Los Angeles, I would have freaked out and canceled our offer immediately. Anyone who owns a house in LA that has any kind of work done on it knows how merciless & expensive the permit process can be. But here in the mountains, unpermitted structures are pretty common. In fact, I don’t think I looked at a single house during my search where I didn’t notice at least one thing that was not up to code.

The rules are a bit more lax up here than down where the “flatlanders” live. It has to be, the lifestyle is completely different. It’s a different world up here. We mountain folk (notice how I put myself into that category already?) spend our summers gathering wood for the winter, not sunbathing in our new bikinis on the beach. We are more in touch with our survival/animal instincts up here… something we don’t pay much attention to in the city simply because we don’t have to.

All summer, I watched as everyone around me gathered & hauled truckloads of wood home. Every time I saw a neighbor, it seemed they were always unloading more wood onto their piles. Most of them had stacks and stacks of wood that spanned their property line and I wondered just how much wood a person really needs! I figured they were being paranoid and saving up for the apocalypse or something. I looked at my big pile left from the previous owner and thought it would take me years to use it all up. So I gardened all summer, took long afternoon naps in my hammock and went for day-long exploratory hikes in the forest while everyone else scurried about hunting & gathering more wood.

Well, now we are 5 months into the cold (our winter started with a big snow storm in early October) and I realize now that the apocalypse they were saving for is here and now! It is one single winter in Big Bear!

I am out of wood and it is COLD!!!! Good thing all those neighbors I once naively laughed at are nice enough to share their hard-earned-summer-gathered wood with me. Next summer I will be more in touch with MY survival instincts and become a gatherer too.

But I digress. Back to our permit situation. When I was living in LA, my friend was adding on a room in the back of his house. One of his neighbors called the Bldg & Safety Dept. and told them about it. The Dept. went to my friend’s house, halted his work & fined him for building without a permit. He never found out which neighbor called but it was a very costly call, not only financially for him, but also the extra time & energy he had to put in to hire a contractor, apply for the permits, and go through each phase of the inspection process.

When I was in escrow with my current home up here, I called the Bldg & Safety Dept. and asked if they could go out to the house and tell me what was not permitted. I wanted to know before I bought it. They said they could only go to a house at the request of the legal owner and no one else. I asked them if the owner thought there might be an unpermitted structure, why would he or she call them to come out and face potential fines? They simply said, “He wouldn’t.”
I understood. It’s the unspoken code up here. Don’t ask, don’t tell.

Michael & I decided when we bought the Z-Tree house not to get permits for it, since no one seems to care up here, not even the permit enforcers! But now that we are tearing down the entire house, we figure we should start on a clean slate and do it right. Spending a few thousand dollars now to be safe may be well worth it in the long run. If the unspoken code happens to change after we build it, we may be faced with fines a lot more than a few thousand dollars.

So we have an appointment with a Bldg & Safety inspector on Tuesday. It’s called a “pre-inspection” and is free of charge. We intend to pick his/her brain for any and all information he/she knows about building & permits. And I’m sure that’s quite a bit.

We also heard that we need to have our plans signed off by an architect and a structural engineer, which could cost upwards of $10,000! That sounds ludicrous to us!!! $10,000 just for a piece of paper!? Could they at least include some lumber with that, maybe some building materials, tools, nails, anything?

We are determined NOT to pay that much or even close to it. Someone told us we could get a set of pre-approved plans from the county. I went to the Bldg & Safety office up here and asked them if I could look through their pre-approved plans. They said I could only get them at the main county office which is an hour away (down the mountain), however, the plans they have do not apply to us on the mountain due to our extreme weather conditions and the snow load requirements for the roofs. Why they don’t have available plans for houses that were built up here is beyond me. I guess we’ll find out on Tuesday.

In the meantime, Mike will be here tonight and tomorrow we’ll start tearing down the interior, ripping up floor boards and trying to avoid any retaining walls until we decide which one wall to leave up in order to do our extensive “remodel.”

Stay tuned for another entry tomorrow along with our sketches of the new house design.

How We Got Started In Real Estate

TREE's DIARY:

I’ve been asked by some “fans” of this journal (thank you! I love you too!) to talk about how we got started in Real Estate and came to acquire the famed Z-Tree house. I have mentioned in other parts of this site how I got started and will leave Mike’s telling of his story to him, should he choose to share it.

But I do want to talk about the problems we had with lenders (and/or brokers) since it was our biggest source of frustration in acquiring this house. In fact, we almost lost the house due to our lender at the very last moment! And this was actually the fourth lender (and/or broker) in the long line of lenders (and/or brokers) we had. By the way, just so I don’t have to repeat “lender (and/or broker)” throughout this entire story since I’m sure you're already as tired of reading it as I am of typing it, I’m going to use the term “lender” from now on though a couple of them were actually brokers. For a description of each, please see my Basic Real Estate Terms (or click on the underlined words). If it becomes significant to clarify which was which, I will.

Our first lender (and/or broker) – JUST KIDDING! I won’t do it again, hee hee – was the lender that I used for my current home, the one I’m living in. For the long story version of Lender #1, click here. For the short story version, keep reading. He was going to charge us two points and would not budge, so we decided to find another lender. After several phone calls, we found Lender #2 who said he could beat the terms we had with the first guy and would not charge us 2 points.

When we finally got the written confirmation from him (it took 2 weeks), he was right about not charging us 2 points, but he did charge us an origination fee that was greater than the equivalent of 2 points. This sneaky practice is further explained in A Word About Lenders & Brokers.

So on we went to find another lender. By this time, we were already in escrow on the Z-Tree house and needed to find someone fast. After some discussion, we decided to go to ING DIRECT. We both love that bank and were willing to make some changes in our original plan in order to go through them. For the long version of Lender #3, click here. For the short version, keep reading.

After 4 weeks in escrow, ING DIRECT fell through. The house was uninhabitable and they don’t loan unless the house is habitable at time of funding. With 2 weeks left to closing, we scrambled to find yet another lender. After many more phone calls, we found lender #4. For the long version of Lender #4, click here. For the short version, you know what to do.

We told them our situation and asked if we extended our escrow another two weeks, would they be able to help us. They said yes. We received the extension from the seller and proceeded with this lender. They promised us zero points and only $850 in total fees. Despite several requests, we never received any paperwork from them on the terms of the loan. In fact, trying to get anything from them was like trying to get Keanu Reeves to show any emotion in his movies (I really like him, btw, I just put that in there to humor Mike). We had no idea if we were going to pay 10% interest and $10,000 in closing costs or what! And we were only days away from closing!

In fact, Mike called them 10 days before our new closing date and asked them how things were going and they said, “don’t worry, we’re on it.” They were so “on it” that when I called them 5 days before our close date, they said, “don’t worry, we should have you guys finalized by the week after next.” When I pointed out that we didn’t have until “the week after next,” the lady said, “OH MY GOD, REALLY?” and put me on hold.

UGH! There were so many more “OH MY GOD, REALLY?” moments that I won’t even bore you with the details. They asked us to request an additional 2 week extension. We did, but this time the seller was not so accommodating. The seller’s agent told us that if we could not get the loan funded in time, the deal is off. We called the lender back and relayed this to them. Lots and lots of scrambling happened and after talking to the agent directly, they were able to get ONE. extra. day. as long as they promised to have the loan funded the very next day!

Suddenly lots of compromises were made, phones ringing off the hook, people came in to work on the weekend, Michael drove up to sign paperwork and in the end, we finally closed not one, but five, days after we were supposed to.

Now if you read my Daily Dose entries, you know I like to keep things positive. So to give this last lender credit, the fees did remain at their promised $850 (outrageously low!), the terms actually were pretty good, and they were able to pull their act together within a few days when it was necessary for them to do so. We found out that they switched loans on us at the very last minute and was able to fund with an entirely new loan in less than a week. That really is pretty fast! I certainly would not use them again, but as a last resort, it’s good to have an inexpensive backup. Only this time with a bit more pushing and prodding to make sure they’re really “on it” when they say they are.

Looking back, it’s all pretty funny, like some kind of dark comedy. I’ve never had an escrow go off without a hitch, this one just happened to be the worst. But it ended up working out, we have a wonderful house and I’ve learned a great deal more about real estate because of it. And we both now have a “lender horror story” to add to our collection to scare the bajesus out of Real Estate newcomers. Just kidding.

Seriously, my advice is just go out and do it! There are so many things that can go wrong and so many things that can go right. It’s all part of the process. Scared or not, just get up. Go out. And do it. Because you can!

For more info on how you can get started, see How To Get Started in Real Estate: Six Steps for the Traditional Homebuyer page. If you need a pep talk first, click here. If you're ready to start and don't need the pep talk, the back story, or are otherwise just sick of reading my rambling stories, go to Helpful Links (I ramble a little on that page too, but just a little, I promise!)


MIKE's DIARY:

How I got started in real estate.

The harrowing experiences perpetrated upon me physically and spiritually during the agonizing 45 days our "government" refers to as escrow were so terrible, so gargantuanly putrid that I will spare you the details which would surely cause immediate bleeding from your eyes and rectum.

I’m kidding. Sorry about that.

The actual process of buying the house did get tough at times but Tree gave you the details of that lovely colonoscopy in her entry. To tell you the truth, I really don’t feel like I’m “in” real estate right now even though my signatures are on a bunch of official looking papers and I have a key. I suppose it’s because I’ve never owned a home or property before so I don’t know what it’s supposed to feel like. It could also be, and the more I think about it the more I think this is it, that because this home I bought with Tree is a solid 2 hours away, I’m not experiencing it in a physical way right now. I don’t care what it is you purchase, if you immediately hide it away and rarely see it you won’t feel like you own it. Possession is very much tied to a tactile experience of that thing. I believe that once we begin remodeling the house I will begin to have a whole new set of feelings about being in real estate. (Stay tuned for those journal entries!)

In terms of the “why” of getting into real estate, I had never seriously considered it. I always thought that it was a game for the semi-rich and above, not for a regular working slob like me. But I want to make money like the next guy, so I got into stocks. Thank you very much tech industry stock market crash where I watched half of my savings scream out in agony and die a horrible death. I became a total investing wimp after that. It was nothing but savings accounts for me after that. Oh, maybe I’d get into the occasional 6 month CD if I’d had a glass of wine or something, but I tell you, I held on to my money like it was one of my nuts. But interest rates suck ass and if you ever hope to make anything in this world you need to make your money work for you. Of all the options out there, real estate just made the most sense to me. It was buying a physical thing. Land is good. People will always want land and if you invest wisely, there is a strong potential for healthy returns.

So that’s WHY I got into real estate, I wanted better returns than the pennies I’d get from the bank, but at the same time I wasn’t ready to do the bungee jump that is the stock market. I was going to take the simplest approach: buy a house that needed some work – not too much – and live in it while I fixed it up. Well, you all know how real estate became pretty insane in 2003-2004 so the only thing I could afford put me either next door to a crack house or across the street from Mr. Burns' nuclear power plant. It was extremely depressing. But I knew this was where I was going to put money and the more I had to wait the more I would have saved to put into it come the time. I had been recreationally looking for just under 2 years when Tree came to me and said let’s go in on a place together in Big Bear. The market was still reasonable up there and we found plenty of fixer-uppers within our price range. I was so fed up with the LA market that this sounded fantastic to me. It would be a smaller investment. I would gain the experience of fixing a place up with a friend and best of all, it would get me in the game.

And that is the one piece of advice I would like to give you. Just get in the game. Be smart about it! Be patient and use your head, but keep playing that tape in the back of your head that says, GET IN THE GAME.

Tree expressing herself

TREE's DIARY:

I have learned throughout the years to be very selective about whom I share my personal life with. Everything from my inner most thoughts and feelings to external choices and decisions have always been sacred to me and I've discovered that others do not always feel that same sense of sacredness for another person's feelings or choices.

In general, people like to express themselves. If you listen closely to what they're saying (and most often what they're NOT saying), you will find through their words and actions an instant X-ray that can see through to their deepest thoughts and feelings. The truth is most people are scared to death! Most people's X-rays reveal they are living from a place of fear. Whether they are externally acting it or not, all it takes is a little careful observation and true listening to discover what is really going on inside a person.

Thoreau once said, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation."

Where does this "quiet desperation" come from? Fear. We all act externally what we feel internally. In other words, if you are living from a place of internal fear, your external choices and actions will be based on that fear.

Because of this, I have learned throughout the weeks to be very selective about whom I share my house plans with. I have noticed that people give me advice (solicited or not) based on their fear. And let me tell you, fear is not a very positive thing. It's draining, actually. After listening to others go on and on about all the things that could go wrong with this project (and there are many), I am exhausted! And I haven't even done anything yet! I'm amazed at how this doesn't seem to tire the person doing the talking. Are they so used to it by now they have built a tolerance for it?

Mike was experiencing this yesterday. He had shared our vision with a friend and after listening to their input, he was beat. He told me how the conversation went and I realized that this person had dumped their fears (in the form of negativity) onto him and he had accepted it. He had taken on their load, without a conscious thought of what was happening, and turned it into his own. Fortunately he recognized it a few moments later and let it go.

The same thing happened to me the first few days too. And then I wondered why I was so tired all the time. So I decided to stop telling everyone about it. Now, when I tell someone about our project and they start pointing out all the things that can go wrong and will go wrong and won't work and why it won't work or can't work, etc., I just stop talking to them. I politely excuse myself with a simple "thank you for your input. I have to go now," and then I go.

Why spend another minute in someone else's negativity when you can spend that same minute in your own positivity?

Now I don't expect everyone to jump for joy and tell us how easy this is going to be or how we won't make any mistakes and how our beautiful house will go up without a hitch, etc. I know this is not true and I'd rather not hear false encouragement either. But what I do want to hear, what will help us the most, is what has been your experience? What challenges did you encounter when building your house and how did you overcome them? What did you learn, what books did you read, who helped you, how did you do it, what materials worked best for you, what tools, where did you start, where did you end, did you discover any tricks that made things run smoother, etc.

I spoke with a neighbor who is building a house with his 19 year old son. It is almost complete and has already received a decent offer to sell when finished. This is their first home-building project. Neither of them had ever built a house before, nor did they have any experience in general construction. I asked him the above questions and he shared with me that when they were beginning, they built the entire frame out of a specific type of wood. And then someone told them that they could not use that type of wood for a house structure up here in the mountains due to certain factors affecting our area that would affect the integrity of the wood in the long term. So they had to tear down the entire frame, buy new wood, and rebuild. Expensive lesson? YES. Time consuming? YES. But do they know now what kind of wood they can and can't use next time? YES.

Does this kind of input help me more than "you can't do this, you're in for so much trouble. You should just hire someone to build it for you?" YES.

When a baby is learning to walk, do people say "no, don't do that. You might fall?" NO. They know the baby will fall, not once or twice, but numerous times, and sometimes they get hurt when they fall. But that is how babies learn to walk. They fall, they get up, they try again. They fall, they get up, they try again. Over and over until they finally learn. We were all once babies and that is exactly how we learned. Why have we, as adults, forgotten this excellent method of learning how to do something?

It is interesting to note that most people we have talked to have never built a house themselves. Yet, they seem to know what we should and shouldn't do to build one and whether we can or can't. How do they know this? I'm only asking because I'm curious about this mentality. I have never built a house before. How do I know if I can or can't if I've never tried? Perhaps I can. Perhaps I can't. But I won't know for sure until I dive in and see. I had never shingled a roof before until I actually shingled one. I didn't know whether I could or couldn't, or what to do or what not to do, so I bought a book, read it, and asked questions from people who had shingled roofs before. And then I climbed a ladder and started shingling. And wouldn't you know, I can shingle a roof! Of course, I shingled my thumb a couple of times too! But it was all part of the learning process and my thumb has healed and has since forgiven me.

I know people have good intentions and are trying to help. Most are simply trying to protect us from making huge mistakes and wasting tons of time, money and energy. And we really do appreciate it. We know we're going to make costly mistakes. We know we'll fall and we know we'll have to get up and try again. It's all part of the process. That is what makes it a FUN CHALLENGE for us. If we knew how to do it with our eyes closed, it wouldn't be so much fun or much of a challenge, would it?

We would love to continue receiving input & ideas from others (even if you don't know what the heck you're talking about, it's ok, we don't either!) but please leave your negativity at the door. If we have already torn down the walls and there is no door (just like there is no spoon), please use your imagination to envision one.

Otherwise, thank you for your input. We have to go now.

Challenge eBay's policies

TREE's DIARY:

Well, I guess it had a good run. It seems that eBay has a thing against rat poop. I received an email from them tonight stating they have "determined that your item is inappropriate for listing on eBay" and they "regret to inform" me that they have removed the listing.

Though I did a full search in their "prohibited and restricted" items list before posting it, I did not come across rat poop, or any kind of poop for that matter. I have to admit, I was a little surprised feces was not on the list, but I figured, if one can sell cow poop and even worm poop, why can't one sell rat poop?

Rats deserve a chance, just like all other living beings, don't they? Poor rejected rats and their poop. Now what will I do with 26 pounds of rat poop?

Alas, perhaps all is not lost. I emailed eBay back with my reasons for why it should not have been removed. We'll see if they too come to accept the poop.

Get Close-up Photos of Rat Poop

TREE's DIARY:

Wow. I never knew rat poop would be such a hot item! The listing has only been up for less than a day and I have already received numerous requests for close-up shots of the rat poop.

One potential bidder even asked if I had any photos that will show the different textures and colors. Far be it for me to disappoint. After all, I'm a big supporter of knowing what you're getting before you buy.

I have posted a few close-up photos on today's "photo link." On the top right of this page, you will see a link that says "click here for more photos." Please note that I am not a professional photographer so these photos are about the best you're going to get.

Before you click on the link, please read the disclaimer below. I have also added it to the photos page for extra caution... to give you another chance to change your mind before it's too late. There are only 4 photos, but if you're not used to this sort of thing, I'm sure it can be pretty repulsive.

Disclaimer: Please read before proceeding further! WARNING: The following photos contain graphic images. They are not suitable for all viewers and should be viewed at your own risk. The following are extreme closeup photos of rodent excrement, and should not be viewed by those with weak stomachs. If you are pregnant or nursing, please consult a doctor before viewing. By proceeding, you are agreeing to our terms and will not hold us liable for any illnesses, emotional distress or death caused by the viewing of the photos.

1/30/05 UPDATE: Due to the listing having officially ended, I have removed the close-up photos. If you missed them, good for you!!! Be grateful your eyes were spared the filth!

List rat poop on eBay

TREE's DIARY:

Well, I did it. I listed our rat poop bundle up for adoption. Waaaaaaaaah! I'm feeling a bit sad, to be honest. I know it's silly but I guess I really did get attached to it. Why? I have no idea! I mean, it's rat poop, for goodness sake! What the heck am I supposed to do with it? Especially 26 pounds of it!

I researched the web to see if there actually is a viable use for rat poop, but a simple search in Google produced no results, only more stories of other people and their rat poop experiences. I am happy to report, though, that not a single one ever collected 26 pounds of rat poop in one cleaning!

Hmmm... come to think of it, that's not something I should be very proud of, should it? But dammit, I am! That's an awful lot of rat poop!

So anyway, the listing is up for the world to see. Please join me for a moment of silence to wish my little rat poop pellets a new owner who will be just as proud of them as I am.


MIKE's DIARY:

(Tree's note: Mike said he has nothing to say about this. Maybe he's mourning in his own quiet way.)

Solve rat poop question

TREE's DIARY:

Well, I've finally heard from Mike. He did, indeed, freak out. But he is feeling much better today. All it took was a bottle of Cuervo. Just kidding! Seriously, he has been on the go since returning home and hasn't had a chance to process last night's dinner, let alone the fact that we're going to tear down and build up an entire house by ourselves. Did we mention neither of us have any experience doing that??

Anyway, he promises to post an entry soon. As soon as he can face it like a man!

In all honesty, he's still just as excited about the house, maybe even more so now, what with the added excitement of fear.

My living room has become a storage facility for tools. One can't walk around without bumping into a band saw here and a sander there. His family brought them up for us to use and we were going to keep them in the new house but the previous owner still had keys so we felt it would be better to store them here… where I can play with them. I love putting on my tool belt, holding a power drill in my hand and acting like I know what I'm doing.

I went to the house today to see if the previous owner had dropped off the keys as promised. He did. All 31 of them! There was a big manila envelope in the middle of the floor, full of keys, with no note, no tag saying which keys go to which locks. There are only 3 doors leading into the house and though each window has padlocked storm shutters, there are certainly not 31 of them! So my next task is to find out which keys fit where.

Also lying in the middle of the floor was the big Hefty bag filled with rat poop. It made me wonder, what does one do with 26 pounds of rat poop (yes, I actually weighed it)? Can I use it as fertilizer for my garden? Somehow, using rat poop for fertilizer doesn't quite have the same appeal as using cow poop. Why is that? It's the same thing isn't it? I mean, isn't poop poop no matter which butt it comes out of? Perhaps the difference is in the presentation. When I go to the nursery to get cow poop, it comes packaged in a pretty plastic bag labeled "Organic Fertilizer." I don't see it. I don't smell it. I don't even think about where it comes from. Though I know it contains cow poop, bone meal or dried blood (that's what most organic fertilizers are made of, by the way), I don't mind spreading it around my garden and digging in it with my bare hands when planting. But somehow, the thought of doing that with rat poop repulses me, even though I did use my finger to pry it out of the cracks when cleaning. By the way, for the record, let me reiterate that it was a GLOVED finger. Do you hear that, Mike? G-L-O-V-E-D! He will never let me live this one down.

Since my garden is a source of joy and comfort for me, I prefer not to be repulsed every time I work in it. So that leaves me with an unanswered question: what exactly does one do with 26 pounds of rat poop? And then it hit me. Like 26 pounds of rat poop, smack dab in the head.

eBay!

Why not? If we're going to build an entire house from the ground up, we're going to need some money! And what better place to make quick, easy money than eBay? It's brilliant!

Mike thinks I should throw it away. But it seems so cold and harsh to just throw it away, don't you think? I mean, I've bonded with my rat poop. I've become one with it. I let it flick off my face, touched it with my finger (gloved!), scraped it off my floor, dug it out of the cracks and crevices, and more importantly, I've learned from it. After all that, how can I just dump it in the trash? After all we've been through together?

No. I cannot do that and live with myself. Tomorrow, beloved rat poop, we're going to find you a new home, a home where you will be appreciated and loved and recognized for all your wonderful qualities.

Tomorrow we list you on eBay.


MIKE's DIARY:

I will never understand women.

Let new plans sink in

TREE's DIARY:

Not much happened today with the house. Actually, neither of us even went there today. We need some time to process our new plans, internally. It's not every day one decides to tear down a house and build it up again.

I'm feeling more at peace with our decision to tear it all down now. I guess I just needed to sleep on it and let the idea soak in. It has been a full weekend, with a lot of activity, mentally, physically and emotionally. With Mike back in L.A., I've had the day to go inward and explore my feelings.

Solitude has always helped me to find my center. I took a walk in the forest this afternoon and felt recharged, connected and focused again. Something about being surrounded by nature, trees towering over you and hearing the ground crunch below you as you step on their fallen leaves. And you can hear nothing but the life of the forest happening all around you & the scurrying of little insects and critters. Sometimes I swear I can hear the trees growing. The forest welcomes you; it opens up as you walk through it and closes in behind you, embracing you with its trees and branches. When you take a deep breath, it is as if you are breathing in the spirit of the trees and you can feel it surging through your entire body.

I love the forest. I love it up here. It is absolutely beautiful. Forests and mountains as far as the eye can see. I moved up in June, having had enough of city living and its fast paced, dog-eat-dog mentality. I wanted to return to a simpler, more grounded life. As long as I can remember, the forest has always called me to it; I just never listened, until now.

Perhaps at a later date, I will be ready to move back to the city. But for now, I'm enjoying my life up here, "one mile closer to heaven" as they say in Big Bear.


MIKE's DIARY:

The Day After.

It took me 3 hours to get to LA. I showered then went right in to work. By the time I stepped into my office I had already been up 5 hours. Not my favorite way to start a day. I didn't really have time to reflect on the weekend because there was plenty of catch up work from my Friday off to keep me answering emails for hours.

At least I didn't think I was thinking about the weekend. It was getting towards the end of the day when all of a sudden all these numbers started crashing down around me: How much is this going to cost? What are my monthly expenses? I have to add a mortgage and insurance to that! How long will our money last before we're forced to stop building? Holy crap, what have we done?! I seriously wanted to just run out of the building and wave my arms around in the air like a maniac. (Why do you suppose that is? I mean I really envisioned myself with my arms up like a fool, just running around hollering in frustration and fear. Funny, the things we think about.) I was basically having a little panic attack. The immensity of what we were doing hit me and the logical side of me - which is usually the dominant part of my brain - took over. I guess I had tucked away my risk-taking dreamer side while I was at work and unbeknownst to me my practical side had begun to analyze our situation. That bastard.

So I needed "practical" reassurance and I needed it fast. I had to have a feeling of control over what we were getting ourselves into. Now, I would love to say that in typical guy fashion I went out and hit the gym or worked the punching bag for an hour, but I didn't. I hate to admit it but I went shopping. I don't know what it is but there is something therapeutic that happens when you buy stuff. So hello, Amazon.com. I bought 3 books: Plumbing A House, Wiring A House and House Framing. I fully believe I will soon know everything in these books and that will give me the powers and abilities needed to have a fighting chance to complete our plans. True or not, it did make me feel better so even if I don't read a page, they kept me from doing that arm-waving thing which would have been really hard to live down.

Pick Brains of Z Family for Ideas

TREE's DIARY:

Today Michael's family drove up to see the house. His parents, sister and one younger brother came. We were planning on picking their brains for ideas on how to fix up the house. His parents have some experience in building so we thought their insight would be invaluable. After all, if you don't know what you're doing, surround yourself by people who do.

And, boy, do Mike and I ever need surrounding!

They had some great suggestions, and throughout the day as they asked us questions and shared their experiences, I started realizing that I have absolutely no idea what the heck I am doing! As the day progressed, I became more and more overwhelmed and convinced of my ignorance and I wondered if Mike was feeling the same way. Since we had a full house, it was hard to speak to him one on one in any intimate way. So I kept looking at him, hoping to catch a glimpse of certainty and confidence in his eyes. I found solace in the hope that at least one of us would know what we're doing in the months to come.

Unfortunately, I saw nothing of the sort in him.

It wasn't until they left that evening that we were able to talk and share our true feelings. It turns out that he was pretty much just as overwhelmed as I. If he tries to pull man-pride and deny it in his entry for today, let me assure you, in our intimate moment of sharing, this is what he said!

After hours of talking (I can't believe I kept his attention that long!) and planning, we finally decided that since we have no clue how to expand a wall, we might as well go all the way with our cluelessness. Why not just tear down the entire house and build it from ground up?

Yep. I really did mean that. Tear it all down. Build it all up again. In digging deeper into what we really want out of this project, we discovered that we will be compromising our grand ideas by fixing what we currently have. By working with the existing structure and design, we will have to make some adjustments and compromises and will have to settle for less than what we both really want.

Hmmm…. Sounds kind of like the history of our relationship. But alas, there's another time and place for our story.

On with the house. At first, I put up much resistance to the idea of tearing it all down and starting from scratch. Mike felt it was the best thing to do. So the hours passed, we talked, we argued, we freaked out, he tried to go home a couple of times, he came back, we talked some more, argued some more, freaked out some more.

And eventually, we came to find peace again.

I think what finally turned me was when Mike started speaking my language. After all his logical & sensible explanations as to why it was better his way, he finally said (probably out of desperation, since he rarely talks like this), "when life throws you a gift, you accept it and run with it. It's a karmic present; you have to do what it calls for you to do."

Whoa!

And there came my awakening. He was right, after all. I was resisting out of fear. This was my fear: Where are we going to get all that money to build a whole house? How are we going to build an entire house ourselves when we don't even know the difference between a slab and a raised foundation? What happens if we get it all wrong? What if we use the wrong materials then have to start all over again? What if we cross the black wire with the red wire and blow up the whole mountain?

My lesson for today: Feel the fear and do it anyway.
My 2nd lesson for today: So what if you don't know what you're doing? Just do it anyway!
My 3rd lesson for today: Resistance is futile! Life will go where it goes, whether you resist it or not.
My 4th lesson for today: Accept life's gifts - fully, with faith, trust and willingness.
My 5th lesson for today: Read my own Daily Dose inspirations and put them to practice!
My 6th lesson for today: Mike is sometimes right.


MIKE's DIARY:

So this was an interesting day.

Parents came up as well as my sister and one of my younger brothers. I was excited to have them look at the house and get their initial impressions. We have some pretty lofty plans for the place and I was really curious what my dad, who is an incurable do it yourselfer, was going to think. As we walked around the house I couldn't help but jump right in to what we planned to do with that particular portion of the house. I guess my excitement level about everything was still pretty high. And I also felt that the house itself is in such need of work you really HAVE to jump past its current state and look to what you want it to be.

The more I talked to my dad about the house, its potential and our plans, the more he kept saying, "Well, if you're going to do that, you might as well do this." Despite Terri and my reservations about making this too big an operation, I couldn't help but get caught up in the idea of making this place great. It was really fun to just let go and imagine what could be. We had hoped to keep this an easy remodel job. Work the plumbing a little. Put in some lights. Put up drywall. That sort of thing. Now I was looking at knocking down all the concrete walls and extending the foundation a good 15-20 feet and building a bloody 2-story house from the ground up! At that point it didn't really dawn on me the full scope of what we were saying. I mean I don't know how to build a friggin' house! But just look at these pictures of where this house sits and you tell me you wouldn't want a beautiful home here. I mean this house deserves to be great. The location is great. The deck is great. This house deserves to be at least as great if not more so. And that's when I knew we had to tear it down. I didn't think about the money or the time it would take to finish it. It just hit me like a brick; it was the right thing to do.

My family left about 4pm and I stayed back to talk to Tree about this new and drastic change in our plans which had been suggested. She wasn't convinced tearing down the house was the way to go but we talked - for about 2 hours - and I just felt very strongly about this and wouldn't really give it up. I just couldn't see the house, as it currently stood, as being the right house for that plot. And as we spoke, Tree began to see that too. I mean this new direction we were considering seriously freaked me out, tearing down the entire house and rebuilding is HUGE! And I have to admit, my solution to dealing with this was both simple and very unlike my usual way of thinking: I knew deep down what I believed so I wouldn't sweat the details.

It had been raining pretty consistently for days, and getting back home that night was going to prove to be one hell of a pain in the ass. I got lucky in that I left after my folks did. My first attempt was around 6pm and as I got into town I called my sister to see how they were doing. In 2 hours they had only just made it through the city and were at the edge of the lake! The Sunday ski traffic was way more intense than we had thought. 2 hours later I tried again, called my sister and found out that after 4 hours they were still going down the mountain (it usually only takes an hour to get down to the base of the mountain, by the way). At that point I decided to stay the night and leave early in the morning.

This actually proved to be a really good thing because we started talking about the house again but on a much more positive and creative note and we started designing the house. All in all it took us about 4 hours to do. There was a lot of back and forth. What I like. What she likes. I don't like that. She doesn't like this. Then suddenly something started to take shape. And there it was. We had a rough sketch and floor plan of the house we imagined to be there. It was beautiful. And it was completely ours, not some pre-existing shape. We made this to fit our vision of what we each saw fitting in that space and it was perfect.

That was a giant step. We don't know if this plan will actually work, but what it did for me was to give me a taste of the kind of work we have ahead of us. Where things may seem bleak or impossible, but if we bang our heads together enough and long enough, we'll find a way to do it. I hope I'm not being naïve but for now it gave me the boost I needed.

(It took my parents 6.5 hours to get home on what should have been a 3 hour ride. Damn skiers.)

Continue to eliminate rat poop from premises

TREE's DIARY:

A person can get used to anything. I have always believed that, and today, I affirm it, if only for myself. When I first walked through the house, prior to buying it, I had my shirt collar pulled over my mouth and nose. The amount of rat poop inside was abhorrent. I could not take a single step without wedging those little poop pellets into the ridges of my shoes. I created an invisible force field around me, maintaining a solid two foot distance from the walls and any other structure in the house, in fear that rat poop would somehow jump from the walls directly onto me if I as much as brushed against something.

It has been pretty much that way every visit to the house since. Until yesterday. Yesterday was a mere taste of what was to come. Yesterday, armed with a respirator over my mouth & nose and a shop vac, I sucked up loose, dry pieces of poop in the living room area. I maintained my force field and stayed far away from the kitchen, where the water leaks had moistened and reactivated the smell of old excrement. Walking into the kitchen, one would not wedge pieces of poop in the ridges on the bottom of their shoes, one would mush globs of coagulated poop in every ridge & surface on the bottom of their shoes. If one listened closely, one could actually hear the mushing as it occurred.

Today, however, was another day. Today, I discovered Zen and the Art of Rat Poop. Today, I became one with the rat poop.

Today, with the clear goal of eliminating rat poop, and knowing it had to be done, I became a different person than I was yesterday and the days before. The day started like yesterday, we went to the house to find that our water leak solution from yesterday was not as efficient as we thought. There were different leaks this time, from what was left of the melting snow & ice we hadn't shoveled off the roof. It couldn't go through the area we covered yesterday, so it found a different way to come through. After spending an hour shoveling the remaining snow & ice, I went inside on a mission.

Eliminate the rat poop, once and for all.

I put on the respirator, latex gloves and armed myself with the shop vac and my special force field. To begin, I started clearing the dry, loose pieces. Then I found that some dry loose pieces were dry loose clumps, and some dry loose clumps were once wet loose pieces. And some wet loose pieces created red and brown stains when they were excreted, no doubt long ago. Not only did they create stains, but they also became the stains and had to actually be pried off the surface. At first, I used the tip of the vacuum nozzle, 3 feet away from me, to scrape them off. This worked, but not as well for the tough stains. By the end of the first hour, I was using a 10 inch scrap of wood I had found. This worked for the tough stains but not as well for the small cracks & crevices in which the poop had buried itself. By the end of the second hour, the scrap had broken and I was left with a 6 inch poop-poker. This worked well for the small cracks & crevices but was an inconvenience to have to keep putting it down, picking it up, putting it down and picking it up. By the end of the third hour, I was reduced to using my finger. This is what I had become.

By this time, I had found a rhythm. Vacuum, loosen with finger, vacuum. Vacuum, loosen with finger, vacuum. The respirator had come off, the force field had disappeared, and rat poop was flying everywhere. I didn't care. I was on a mission. It wasn't so much rat poop anymore as it was a mere step in the process. The goal was to clean the house, rat poop was just a detail.

While cleaning, I realized that it had never occurred to me to hire someone else to clean the rat poop. This house is mine. This project is mine, I chose it. Why would I rob myself of the pleasure (yes, pleasure!) of experiencing it in all its beauty (yes, beauty!), rat poop pieces in my face and all.

The beauty of this project is the journey itself. It is not the end result, the finished house. If I wanted a finished house, I would have bought a finished house. But it is the process of finishing it, the process of discovering how to finish it is what I bought into. The process is what appeals to me and the process is what it's all about. It is the ups and downs, the highs and lows, the crying, the laughing, the loving, the giving, the receiving, the losing, the learning, the hurting, the caring, the sharing.

Today, in cleaning rat poop, I discovered a whole new respect for my life's journey. It is the process of discovering myself and the Universe that is what appeals to me. The beauty of life is the journey itself. It is not the end result.


MIKE's DIARY:

Rat Shit.

I could stop here because that basically sums up the day. But for the sake of the journal I'll elaborate. Tree started on the house while I grabbed a rake and started dredging the little stream in front of the house. Did we not mention the stream?? How friggin cool is that, huh? It's dry during most the year, but when the winter snow begins to melt, we get a little stream that runs through our front yard. Tree wants to create steps where the water first comes in, a sort of mini-waterfall, and I want to make a little pond area before it gets sucked away down the street. Both are projects for warmer weather.

Raking the stream was tough but satisfying. The drain had backed up and we had the pond I wanted but it was a big mess of branches, leaves, dead squirrels and decomposed alien parts. I'd pull out huge globs of crap and toss them into a pile so I could measure my progress. Men love to measure, it's in our nature. And when I started to clear the drain I could hear the sudden rush of water I was letting loose down stream as our pond began to empty. I wondered what sort of devastation I was causing down the road as this sudden surge of H20 was unleashed. Oh well.

That done, I made my way up to the house. Tree had the wet/dry vac going sucking up the mounds of rat nuggets that had collected in there. The amazing thing about cleaning, any place really, is the huge difference a little elbow grease can make. Already the place looked amazing. I mean it's still gutted, uninhabitable and stinks like a frat house basement, but for the first time I didn't feel like I was in a sick person's room. I could move around a little and it felt "clean."

We only had the one vac so I got to shoveling. I cleared out a chunk of the patio and the walkway along the side. My family is coming up tomorrow and I figure this would make walking around the house a little easier.

When Tree took a break I grabbed the vac and headed upstairs. I pushed the previous owner's crap along the walls and did the carpet up there. Even though I know the corners still have rat shit cemented into the carpet, it actually looked clean 30 minutes later. At this point, I had heard rumors that Tree was actually handling the shit. I take pride in the fact that I didn't have to stoop that low; my fingers never touched those nasty rat bombs.

The rest of the day was much of the same. We went from 10am to 8pm with a 2 hour lunch break. So instead of boring you with the minutia of cleaning, I'll share with you what was going through my head at the end of the day.

You don't know gross until you look into a Hefty bag ¾ full of wet rat shit. Those dark little pellets stare up at you like they're angry you're taking them from their home - and I swear to you, they ARE angry! As I write this I am still amazed at how these rats were able to crap into these impossibly tight corners. Seriously, do they back their asses up to these nooks and crannies and fire them in like little scud missiles? No matter how hard I jammed that thin nozzle of the vac into these crevices I couldn't reach those little rat pellets of mass expulsion. I just know when some of these wall boards come down we're going to have a whole new stockpile of crap on our hands. But for now, I'm really impressed with how much we accomplished today.

And you now barely notice the smell of rat shit in the air. Maybe one day it will be completely gone…

Eliminate all rat poop from premises

TREE's DIARY:

I've learned an extremely valuable lesson today, a lesson I will be able to carry with me into all my future relationships.

The lesson is this: Never show a man a Victoria's Secret catalog when you need him to do something.

Mike arrived today at 2:30. Considering we did not officially own the house until around 1:00, his late arrival did not matter much. But he was starving when he arrived so I made us a quick lunch before heading out to clean our new officially owned rat poop.

Towards the end of the meal, I showed him a Sunset magazine that had a photo of a kitchen design I liked. To my surprise (since we haven't been able to agree on anything yet), he liked it too. He became excited about our kitchen potential and absorbed himself in the magazine. I then got up to finish the dishes and get ready to go, but just before I walked out of the room, (as a joke!) I threw a Victoria's Secret catalog on the table and said, "Wouldn't you rather be looking at this instead?" Then I left.

When I returned, ready and anxious to go, he was lying back in my papasan chair with his head buried in the Victoria's Secret catalog. It took a good 20 minutes to finally get him to pull his head out of Laeticia Costa's glossy breasts to go clean rat poop. Given his choices, though, I can't say that I blame him much.

With broom in hand, we walk up the street to our new house at 3:30 (it's a 10 minute walk from my home). The first thing we notice is the entire kitchen (or what is to become the kitchen) is flooded. So we must first find the leak and fix it. We climb up to the roof above (which is also the deck for the loft upstairs), and discover it is covered with a foot of snow. The snow is melting, dripping into the cracks of the exhaust ducts leading into the house downstairs.

We decide to shovel out the snow and cover the deck/roof with a roll of shingles conveniently left by the previous owner. The snow turns out to be a cover for a 1-2 inch slab of ice across the entire deck. It takes us about an hour to shovel the snow & break the ice.

Mike then decides to clear a pathway on the bottom front deck into the house, which consists of the same amount of snow & ice (a good idea considering one must need ice skates to get to the front door) and I go inside and start sweeping rat poop in the living room where it is dry. Another hour goes by and Mike comes in saying he is tired and ready to call it a day.

Even though I wanted to keep working, out of respect to my friend, we leave. It is 5:30 and we are finished with Day One. We decide to go out to dinner and celebrate our joint venture in home ownership. This is Mike's first venture into real estate and he is very proud. This is my third venture and I am still very proud. I'm looking forward to getting an early start tomorrow morning.


MIKE's DIARY:

I had taken a Friday off of work to get a jump on the day, get a couple errands done early then be on the road by 10 or 11.

I got out of bed at 10am.

But as Jason Bourne says, "Sleep is a weapon." So feeling locked and loaded I packed up, did my dishes, fuddled around and finally hit the road close to noon. I stopped by Home Depot to pick up a small broom knowing that our main goal this weekend was to clean up the place. Rats had apparently been using the place free of rent over the past few years and there are piles of crap a good 2-3 inches high in places.

The ride up to Big Bear wasn't bad. It's a 2 hour trek in good traffic and I made it in 2.5. I got in about 2:30 rarin' to go…if I wasn't so damn hungry. I told Tree (this is Terri for those of you who don't know) to make me some food! DO IT! While we were eating she showed me a Sunset magazine with a really great kitchen layout that was similar to ours. It's amazing how interested you get in these sorts of things once you own a home, it's a complete 180 for me. The Home & Garden channel has replaced The Simpsons! But when Tree left the room she made the mistake of tossing a Victoria's Secret on the table…I'm only human. 5 minutes later we walk out the door. Maybe 10.

I love standing on the deck of my house. I love saying "my house!" The house is great, it's GOING to be great. I can't believe the view, it's beautiful, crazy beautiful. The forest rolls out in front of us and we have a front row seat. It's just amazing. From snow covered mountains to shit covered shelves, it was time to get to work.

A lovely little surprise the melting snow left us was a leaky kitchen. Apparently the snow & ice on the back patio had begun to melt and found pathways into our kitchen soaking almost everything in there. Mmmmm, rat poop oatmeal, my favorite!

We climbed a tree (a real tree, not Terri) to get to the upper deck where the leak was coming from and started shoveling. The previous owner had left some extra roll roofing which we laid out around the areas we thought were leaking. After that I ended up shoveling a pathway on the deck from the steps to the front door so we could get in and out without falling on our ass. Tree did a bunch of sweeping in the living room. She finally had enough around 5:30 so we called it a day.

We celebrated with dinner at Big Bear's finest restaurant, The Iron Squirrel. I know, I know, what can I tell you, it's a different world up here. I'm really enjoying the high of owning a home and the thrill of knowing we'll be doing most of the work ourselves. I can't help but wonder, though, if a month from now I'll look back on this day and think, "You poor stupid man, you had no idea what you were in for!" Well bring it on! Good, bad or worse this is MY place and I'm loving it.

And no, they don't serve squirrel there.

How Z-Tree came to us and our plans for it

TREE's DIARY:

Though the house looks beautiful from the outside, it is completely gutted inside. There are no sinks, no bathtub, no shower, no appliances, no flooring, no drywall, no nothing. Actually, that is a bit of an exaggeration. One thing it definitely has, in mass quantity, is rat poop!

But aside from all that, it really is BEAUTIFUL!

Our goal is to fix it up ourselves (neither of us have any experience in remodeling or construction, by the way) and make it look as beautiful in physical life as it appears in our minds. Let's just hope we can still remain friends after all is said and done.

So far, we do not agree on the siding (I want log, he likes it as is), the bathroom design (I like open space, he wants a separating wall inside for privacy), the walls (I want paint, he wants wallpaper), the second floor decks (I want an open wraparound, he wants private decks for each room), and the list goes on and on...

The house came to us (and I use that phrasing because we were not even looking for it) as a sudden and unexpected surprise. My agent called me one day and said, "Go check out this house."

We were already overdue in escrow on another house and were waiting for the final closing. But the conviction in his voice made me drop everything, rearrange my travel plans for that weekend, and "go check out the house."

I fell in love with it immediately and saw the amazing potential it had. I called Mike and told him we had to make an offer on it ASAP. Though he hadn't seen the house for himself, I was convinced enough for the both of us, and he agreed. We made an offer for full price that day, the offer was accepted within two days and all this occurred before the agent had time to put the "For Sale" sign up. And can you believe it, they even threw in the rat poop for free!